Wednesday, July 30, 2014

REPORT: The Pirates Wants Jon Lester, Koji Uehara, Andrew Miller, Jonny Gomes, Felix Doubront, Mike Carp And Will Middlebrooks. That's Rather Ballsy Of Them

This is the sports page from the Beaver County Times in Beaver, Pennsylvania:

From Beaver County Times:
The Pirates, as reported by The Times earlier this month, had been considering making a push for Lester for a while. The Pirates are willing to part with a club source called a “significant” package of prospects.

The potential exists for a blockbuster trade. The Pirates also have interest in a pair of Red Sox relievers — closer Koji Uehara and left-hander Andrew Miller — and right-handed hitting outfielder Jonny Gomes.

Starling Marte and Pedro Alvarez also could be included if the Red Sox include players who would be under club control beyond this season such as left-hander Felix Doubront, first baseman/outfielder Mike Carp or third baseman Will Middlebrooks.

I'm not sure if this is legit or it's some bored sportswriter throwing a bunch of shit at the wall. Either way, I would have no problem with the Red Sox going nuclear. None whatsoever. What they have obviously isnt working and Id rather watch the young guys fail than continue to watch this shit show.

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Well, This Is Interesting.


We can only hope they throw in Clay Buchholz and Stephen Drew too.  

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It Looks Like Tasty Burger Is Feeling The Wrath Of All This Jon Lester Bullshit.

These poor bastids just want suggestions for burgers. I guess they picked a bad day to ask a harmless question.

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

VIDEO: If You're Wondering Who This Dude Tyler Gaffney Is, Here Are A Couple Of His Highlight Reels.

The Patriots claimed running back Tyler Gaffney off waivers yesterday.

 If you don't know who he is, he was the Carolina Panthers sixth round pick in the 2014 draft and is pretty damn good.  He will miss this season with a knee injury and the Panthers were dumb enough to put him on waivers thinking no one would claim him.

Then Bill Belichick did what Bill Belickick does...and claimed him.  Anyway,  Here are some of his highlight reels:

"Tyler Gaffney Pro Day"

"Tyler Gaffney Highlights Top 5 Running Back 2014 NFL Draft" 

Bill Belichick is not a stupid man.

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FINAL: Blue Jays 14 Red Sox 1

Clay Buchholz sucks. Felix Doubront sucks. And John Farrell sucks for not letting Brock Holt pitch last night.

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Your Tweet Of The Day

It appears the Red Sox are going with the nuclear option and will blow the whole dam thing up. We'll, the pitching staff at least. I don't have a problem with that at all.

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GIF: Some Poor Bastids Had Their Windshield Shattered By A Melky Cabrera Home Run. That Sucks.

So, not only did this family watch the Red Sox get their asses kicked, they also got their windshield shattered.

Cabrera HR

That suuuucks.

And whoever took the ball off of the windshield and kept it is an asshole.

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Monday, July 28, 2014

Rays Pitcher Chris Archer Complained To The Media About David Ortiz After His HR And Epic Bat Flip Yesterday.

From ESPN:
Chris Archer was offended by Ortiz's exaggerated bat flip and leisurely stroll around the bases, which broke a scoreless tie in the third.

"I think it was a perfect example of what Price said. All of my interactions ... off the field have been good but when it comes to him on the field, I don't know what makes him think that he can showboat the way he does and then nobody retaliate, nobody look at him a funny way or nobody pitch him inside."
"I don't know why he feels like that but obviously he feels the way David [Price] said he does. He feels like he's bigger than the game."

There is a very simple solution to all of this. Either get David Ortiz out or drill him in the ass and handle it like men.

Bitching and moaning about it to the media after the game is classless and doesnt accomplish anything...other than making the Rays look like a bunch of whiny bitches.

Professional baseball has been around for over 100 years. History tells us that when a guy shows you up, you drill him and take care of business on the field.  Bitching to the media after the game about how David Ortiz hurt your feelings is basically like telling the world that you have no balls.

If this Chris Archer kid thinks he's doing baseball a favor by trying to smear Ortiz's name, he isn't. He's actually broadcasting to the world that he's a pussy who can't handle his business between the lines. And that is kinda of pathetic, actually.

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GIF: David Ortiz Did An Epic Bat Flip After A 3-Run HR In Tampa Bay. That Takes Balls. Big Brass Ones.

We all know that David Price was pissy about David Ortiz pimping a couple of home runs during the ALDS last year. Well, today in Tampa Bay, David Ortiz hit a monster 3-run home run and flipped his bat like a friggin boss.

Not only did he flip his bat, he took 30 seconds to round the bases (for the record, the longest home run trot in recorded history is 33.39 seconds). Here's the video:

I dont think it was a coincidence that Ortiz pimped a home run IN Tampa. I think he was trying to send a message to David Price. Namely, I think he was saying, "fuck you."

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Sunday, July 27, 2014

REPORT: The Red Sox Have Talked To The Dodgers About Trading Jon Lester For Rihanna's Ex-Boyfriend Matt Kemp.

From ESPN:
He has had debilitating ankle and shoulder injuries that have limited his play the last two seasons, is still owed roughly $118 million on a contract that runs through 2019, and has a mixed reputation as a clubhouse presence, but the Red Sox are considering making a move for Dodgers outfielder Matt Kemp, according to a club source.

With the Sox in need of more offensive production in the outfield, the right-handed-hitting Kemp could be the major piece in a trade for Red Sox left-hander Jon Lester.

The dude has five years/$118 million remaining on his contract.  And a history of ankle and shoulder injuries.  And he's batting .273 with eight home runs and 40 RBIs.  Ben Cherington can't be this friggin stupid.

(editors note: if you don't know what a "giant DB" is, it's a "giant douchebag")

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My Day Sucked Until I Read These Tweets.



Seriously, this Patriots secondary is going to be scary good.  I cannot friggin wait for September 7th.

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Meanwhile, Over In Cardinals Territory...

The guy was basically mailing it in while with the Red Sox and goes 3 for 4 in his first game with his new team? This just makes AJ Pierzynski look like even more of a dick.

Friday, July 25, 2014

VIDEO: Rabid Fans Rushed The Gates At Day 2 Of Patriots Training Camp. I Am So Friggin Ready For Some Football.

Yup, Darrelle Revis and a healthy Rob Gronkowski will do that to people.

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VIDEO: Tom Brady Was On SportsCenter Today Just Shooting The Shit And Talking About Football. I Fuckin Love It.

It's football season, people. It is football season.

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Some Internet Troll Thought It Would Be Funny To Photoshop Milan Lucic In A Canadiens Jersey. Well Hardy Fucking Har Har.

Some dude at The Hockey News made this.  Don't ask me why.  Im going to guess they are just wicked bored over there.  And idle hands are the devils playground.

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