So the Rangers won one game. Big shit. They can give themselves a nice golf clap today and embrace for the wrath of 17,565 rabid Massholes on Saturday. I cant friggin wait for that game.
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Friday, May 24, 2013
I Have A Message For All The Rangers Fans Out There
So the Rangers won one game. Big shit. They can give themselves a nice golf clap today and embrace for the wrath of 17,565 rabid Massholes on Saturday. I cant friggin wait for that game.
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I Think I Found The Only Shitstain In This Town Happy That The Bruins Lost
Comparing Tuukka Rask falling on his ass to Bill Buckner letting the ball roll between his legs is a dick move. It really is. I swear, this douchebag is rooting for the Bruins to lose this series.
Remember, Shaughnessy is the guy who invented the phrase "Curse of the Bambino" and wrote a book about it--and made a lot of money selling a horseshit curse. I wouldnt doubt it if he has already started writing a book about the collapse of 2013 in an attempt to turn the Bruins into the loveable losers in this town.
Maybe he'll call it, "The Curse of Tim Thomas." No, he'll get more creative than that. Maybe, "The Ghost of Michael Ryder." Ill stop now. Im sure Little Orphan Annie will surprise us with a gem of a title.
Seriously though, if the Bruins lose, his ugly mug will be all over place rehashing the past collapses in this town and he will have a shit eating grin on his face doing it. For the sake of Bruins fans everywhere, this team need to end this series and end it soon.
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FINAL: Bruins 3 Rangers 4
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One More Thing About That Game...
But seriously, anyone who compares this series to the Flyers series in 2010 needs to be punched in the face. David Krecji dislocated his wrist in Game 3 of that series and didn’t play again. And that was the turning point. That changed everything.
This year is nothing like 2010. Nothing. Only an asshole would compare this series to the 2010 Flyers series. It is lazy, irresponsible douchebaggery (yes douchebaggery, not journalism)
If Tuukka Rask didnt fall down, we'd be talking about how a sucky team put up a good fight and still got swept. That was not a series changing play. The only people calling that a series changing play are the yahoos in New York who think they are the kings shit. I wouldnt expect any less from those arrogant pricks.
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VIDEO: Linesman Says "Thats Enough. Fuck You" To John Tortorella And The Microphone Picks It Up. Thank You CNBC.
Here's something to make you feel better today. Its a linesman saying "fuck you" to John Tortorella. Im not sure which official said it, but I would really like to shake his hand and buy him a beer.
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Thursday, May 23, 2013
Henrik Lundqvist Says Bruins Are Up 3-0 Because Of "Lucky Bounces." I Shit You Not.
From ESPN Boston:
"I've looked at a few games, and they definitely got some lucky bounces," Lundqvist said Thursday morning. "Last game I blame the loss on lucky bounces. They go hard to the net, that's what they do," Lundqvist said. "That's how they've played. They put pucks on the net, and they create chances from rebounds and screens and deflections."
So the Bruins have "lucked" themselves to a 3-0 series lead? Give me a friggin break. I know he wasnt born there, but this guy is starting to sound like every other arrogant, self-absorbed, obnoxious New Yorker.
He wont give credit where credit is due and is treating the Bruins like they are a bunch of assholes who dont deserve to be up 3-0. Keep it classy, Henrik.
The bottom line is the Bruins have been playing a full 60 minutes every game and there are times when his team plays like they just dont give a shit.
Hell, the Maple Leafs put up more of a fight than these clowns.
Daniel Paille beat his defenseman to the net and kocked in a rebound that Tuukka Rask wouldve pounced on. Thats not luck. Thats a result of hard work, hustle and determination. Calling it anything other than that is just ignorant.
This guy is on a sinking ship and is kicking and screaming like a little bitch on the way down. Rangers fans must be so proud.
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Wednesday, May 22, 2013
FINAL: Red Sox 6 White Sox 2
Clay Buchholz didnt even pitch his best game of the season last night and still only allowed 1 earned run over 7 innings. This dude is absolutely filthy. Im sure somewhere Dirk Hayhurst is shaking his head (thats the douche who accused Buchholz of cheating).
Anyway, so the Red Sox avoided getting swept by the White Sox and went 6-3 on the road trip. Im not going to call the road trip pissa but Ill be honest, 6-3 is a pretty damn good road trip.
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Because I Feel Like Being A Ball Buster, Here Is How The Experts At ESPN Boston Predicted The Bruins Rangers Series
So, the Bruins have absolutely dominated the Rangers in this series and have a chance to sweep the tonight. Here is how the experts at ESPN Boston predicted the series. The Rangers made some of them look like real dicks.
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Tweet Of The Night
This was tweeted at 7:41pm last night:
Yea, howd that work out? If I may quote the great Bill Belichick, "stats are for losers."
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Yea, howd that work out? If I may quote the great Bill Belichick, "stats are for losers."
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VIDEO: Tuukka Rask Says "Are You Fuckin Serious?" To Reporter Who Touches His Shit During Interview. You Just Cannot Fuck With Rask This Time Of Year.
This is just further proof that you do not fuck with Tuukka Rask this time of year. On a side note, I love his poise and composure. The dude just keeps on answering questions.
By the way, that reminded me of a scene from a certain movie:
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By the way, that reminded me of a scene from a certain movie:
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Tuesday, May 21, 2013
FINAL: Bruins 2 Rangers 1
Henrik Lundqvist got beat by the Bruins fourth line in a game that the Rangers had to win. And that is friggin awesome.
Shawn Thornton had 2 assists, Gregory Campbell had an assist and Danielle Paille had a goal and an assist, including the game winner. That is just pissa.
Seriously, I think its time for people to stop using the phrase “world class goalie” and Henrik Lundqvist in the same sentence. A “world-class” goalie would have stolen this game. Lundqvist has shown me nothing to prove he is anything more than a middle of the pack goalie in this league.
I am getting so sick of the ball washing. His team was the #6 seed for Christ’s sake. If he didn’t have the words “Vezina winner” on his resume, he wouldn’t even have been talked about in this series.
While Im off on that tangent, Rick Nash sucks, Brad Richards sucks, Carl Hagelin sucks, Dan Girardi sucks, John Tortorella is overrated and Derek Dorsett is a pussy.
Anyway, so the Bruins are now up 3-0 to these bitches from New York. That is fucken awesome.
And this is not 2010. There is no need to feel insecure about this series lead. The Bruins have now played three consecutive games of balls to the wall hockey and the Rangers have looked flat to the point that Im convinced they are trying to get Tortorella fired. They are 0 for 10 on the power play in this series. That isnt normal.
The only way the Rangers win this series is by an act of God. Jesus may save but I can confidently say that he's not going to strap on a pair of skates and help the Rangers with their power play or take over for Lundqvist and stop pucks.
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These Are What Big Bad Bruins Look Like
The Bergeron gash was a result of a face to face collision and Zdeno Chara got a high stick in the face, which by the way none of the on ice officials saw so wasnt called for a penalty.
For the record, neither of these guys went to the locker room for repairs. Hell, neither of them even missed a shift.
This is what a pussy looks like:
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Stan Fischler Is Nothing More Than A Cocky, Piece Of Shit New Yorker Who Deserves To Be Fired
This guy is a hockey analyst for the MSG Network. He gets paid to talk about hockey. Literally, everything he said in his prediction was wrong. I mean, the dude couldnt have been any more wrong. This guy is a friggin idiot and a disgrace to the Rangers broadcast team.
There is a good chance that John Tortorella gets fired if/when the Rangers get swept. This dude should be right behind Tortorella in the unemployment line.
Believe me, I hate Rangers fans as much as the next Masshole, but even they dont deserve to listen to this moron talk about hockey. They are being brainwashed by an idiot with no hockey IQ whatsoever.
If this guy wants to be a fanboy, then maybe he should quit his day job and become a full-time sports talk show caller. Because thats what he sounds like. Or better yet, he can hold pep rallies for all the yahoos in New York who buy his bullshit.
It just pisses me off that this guy gets paid to analyze hockey. It really does.
On top of everything I just said, the dude doesnt know how to add. With the Rangers down 0-3 in the series, he tweeted this:
The dude predicted Rangers in five, for Christ's sake. So does this mean he is changing his prediction? Or does this clown just not understand the concept of math? I am genuinely confused right now.
If he is a true New York bullshit artist, he will probably use semantics to say that he is talking about the fact that he picked them to win, not the fact that he said five games.
Just more bullshit from a true New York asshole.
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If You Want To Cream Your Pants One More Time, Here Is The Video Of Daniel Paille's Game Winning Goal Again.
This was a gritty, ballsy play by Shawn Thornton and a great effort by Paille to bury it. I have a pants tent that probably wont go away for at least a couple of days. I friggin love goals like this. This is a fourth liners goal. Just, pure grit and balls.
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The New York Post Is Doing Our Dirty Work For Us
The NY Post was left with no choice but to shit on the Rangers. They would be morons to wash Lundqvist's balls today.
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The Media In New York Is Already Making Excuses For Lundqvist. Theyre Calling Him "Banged Up" But "Ready To Go." Oh, Cry Me A Friggin River.
From CBS New York:
One key factor for the Rangers is the play — and health — of goalie Henrik Lundqvist. Lundqvist was back on the ice Monday after his rough game on Sunday, in which he also appeared to injure his left shoulder. He was no worse for wear during and following the hour-long practice ahead of Tuesday’s Game 3 in New York.
They just cant give the Bruins credit, can they. Their hard on for Henrik Lundqvist is just too goddamn stiff. "Appeared to injure" his left shoulder? Even Lundqvist admitted that he isnt injured. he is saying that he is just sore.
But the media in New York is having a real hard time accepting the fact that the one-time Vezina winner is having a bad series so far and they are going to cling to his "apparent injury" as the scapegoat when they eventually shit the bed. That is just friggin pathetic.
They are just looking for any way to not give the Bruins credit. Thats the New York way though, isnt it? It's a lot easier to blame an "apparent injury" than to admit the Bruins dominated your one-time Vezina winner and made him their bitch.
Honestly though, Im not surprised by the arrogance and lack of humility. Im just disgusted.
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Its Official. Tedy Bruschi Will Be Inducted Into The Patriots Hall Of Fame.
From Patriots.com:
The New England Patriots announced today that Tedy Bruschi has been voted by fans as the 19th player and 21st member to enter the Patriots Hall of Fame. Bruschi will join Gil Santos, the Voice of the New England Patriots, at an induction ceremony during training camp that is scheduled for Sunday, Aug. 11. The induction ceremony is open to the public and Patriots fans are encouraged to attend.
That ceremony is going to be pissa.
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Monday, May 20, 2013
FINAL: Red Sox 4 White Sox 6
Well, the Red Sox five game winning streak is over. Lester allowed 5 earned runs on the night, all in the first two innings. But Im not going to shit on Jon Lester. The dude has been friggin awesome this season. He was due for a stinker.
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I See Josh Beckett Is Still A Wicked Big Loser.
I know this is totally random but last night was a slow sports night and I feel like shitting on someone. Anyway, that graphic is not photoshopped. Josh Beckett is 0-5 this season with a 5.19 ERA.
Im convinced that if Josh Beckett was still on the Red Sox, this team would suck. The guy is lazy, arrogant and his asshole-ism is contagious.
For the record, as of right now, the Dodgers are 17-25 and in dead last place in the NL West.
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As If You Needed Another Reason To Hate The Rangers...
New York has to have the douchiest bandwagon fans of them all. I really hope these two tools dont show up to Game 3. I dont want to see their friggin mugs on my tv.
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Wow, John Tortorella Must Have Got So Much Pussy Back In The 80's.
This dude must have got so much pussy back in the 80's. Not only did he have a Ron Jeremy mustache back then but it looks like he used to tight roll his pants even when he was skating.
I honestly wouldnt be surprised to learn he drove an IROC-Z and spent his Saturday nights at the wall at Revere Beach....not that there's anything wrong with that.
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The Red Sox Played Yesterday Too. FINAL: Red Sox 5 Twins 1
So, I guess Will Middlebrook hit a home run, John Lackey got the win and there was a 3 hour rain delay.
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I Really Wish We Couldve Heard Jack Edwards Call This Lucic Goal
This goal by Milan Lucic was the fifth goal for the Bruins and it buried the Rangers on a beautiful Sunday afternoon...and in the process made Henrik Lundqvist look like a dick.
I just really wish we could have heard Jack Edwards make the call.
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