Red Sox Are Ranked #10 In Sports Illustrated Weekly MLB Power Rankings...Its Ok, Take A Deep Breathe And Step Away From The Tobin Bridge

Sports Illustrated came out with their weekly MLB Power Rankings yesterday.

The Red Sox are listed at #10 overall and #5 in the American league behind the Yankees, Rays, Rangers and White Sox.

Take a deep breathe and step away from the Tobin Bridge people.

There are still two months left in the season and if the Red Sox were in first place in the American League by 7.5 games with the Rays and Yankees BEHIND them, you’d be worried.

Honestly, considering Dustin Pedroia and Jacoby Ellsbury will return before the end of the season gives us hope.

The Red Sox are getting healthier. The worst is behind them. So #5 in the American League doesnt seem all that bad.

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NEW VIDEO: Guy With Lebron James Heat Jersey At Indians Game Was There For Only 2 Minutes Before He Got Ejected

Ok, we’ve all seen the video of the dude with the Lebron James Heat jersey getting ejected from the Indians game.

But did you know that he got ejected literally two minutes after he got to his seat.

This video is only 2:03 long and you will see him getting to his seat, taunted everyone around him, and then getting kicked out by security:



Heres he is literally leaving the park while the crowd chants “asshole, asshole.”

Former Celtics Head Coach And President Rick Pitino Says Sexual Encounter “took less than 15 seconds”

If you’ve been living under a rock and don’t know, Karen Sypher is accused of extorting former Celtics head coach and team president Rick Pitino for millions in cash, along with other demands.

She threatened to go public and announce that Rick Pitino raped her, impregnated her and gave her money for an abortion if he didn’t give in to the demands

During the trial, Rick Pitinos took the stand and said that his sexual encounter with Karen Sypher “took less than 15 seconds.”


For someone like me who hates Rick Pitino this is gold! Remember, when Rick Pitino and his huge ego took over as head coach of the Celtics he demanded that he also get the title of Director of Basketball Operations and team president, thus ousting Red Auerbach from that position.

His ego and arrogance were disgusting.

Ok, time for the one liners:

-Was he trying to get a shot off before the shot clock expired or something?

-I wonder if she was talking about basketball time or real time. In basketball time, 15 seconds is really about 10 minutes when you take into account fouls, time outs and free throws.

-This gives new meaning to “30 second time out."

This Rick Pitino trial is the trial that keeps on giving....stay tuned

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Masshole Sports Youtube Showdown: "Shaq Singing To Justin Beiber" vs "Goat Who Yells Like A Human"

Who has the sweeter sounding pipes?

Shaquille O'Neal singing to Justin Beiber:





A goat yelling like a human:



Im calling it a toss up.

Shaquille O'Neal STILL Lobbying To Play For Celtics

Shaquille O'Neal STILL wants to play for the Celtics.

According to fanhouse.com, Shaq is aggressively lobbying the Boston Celtics and is “still trying to convince them that his addition would help their quest to win another NBA championship.”

Is there really a downside to the Celtics signing Shaq?

Why is it that Danny Ainge isnt even considering signing Shaq?  He would be a backup center with championship experience playing for the veteran minimum (most likely) AND the guy is basically begging to play for the Celtics.

Cmon Danny. Pick up the phone!



Related Masshole Sports articles:

Shaq Engaged To Reality TV Star Nicole “Hoopz” Alexander And Moving To Sudbury, Massachusetts

PHOTO:  Shaquille O'Neal Will Wear Number 36 For Celtics

advertisement: Adidas Boston Celtics Shaquille O'Neal "Big Shamrock" T-Shirt

File Under: Why Cant We Get Players Like That! Mike Lowell Hits Three HRs, Five RBI For Pawtucket Last Night

Mike Lowell hit three home runs and had five RBI for the Pawtucket Red Sox last night and is batting .471 with Pawtucket during this rehab stint. WOW.

This will no doubt be his last season as a member of the Red Sox and wouldn’t it be something to see him come back strong. Seems as though Mike Lowell is singing a pretty loud swan song.

VIDEO: Nate Robinson Dancing to "Teach Me How To Dougie”

Yesterday Glen Big Baby Davis posted a video on youtube of himself dancing to the song "Teach Me How To Dougie." Did you really think Donkey would be too far behind Shrek?

Today, Nate Robinson posted a video of him and some of his friends dancing to "Teach Me How To Dougie”



Who will be next?????????????????

Honestly, the only Celtic I would really like to see dancing to the Dougie would be Doc Rivers, but I dont thinks that gonna happen.

Call The Neighbors! Wake The Kids! Bruins 2010-2011 Season Tickets Sold Out!

According to the Bruins Official Website, “Bruins President Cam Neely announced today that all Loge and Balcony season tickets are sold out for the upcoming 2010 - 2011 season.”

Wow. The Bruins had a three games to none lead in the second round of the playoffs, collapse and then sell out their season tickets?

Im going to guess Tyler Seguinhas something to do with it.

File Under Awesome: Arod, Sitting On 599 Home Runs, Gets Drilled

Unscripted drama. Its what makes baseball so great. Arod was sitting on 599 career home runs and had the bases loaded. Everyone that was watching the game yesterday at Yankees Stadium was expecting him to hit a grand slam for his 600th home run.

Oh, that would have been like something out of a storybook.

But no, Arod gets drilled! And the icing on the cake is that the Yankees left town after the game to start a 7 game road trip…so Arod most likely wont hit his 600th at home.

As a Red Sox fan, THAT is a storybook! Gotta love it.

Red Sox Are 8 Games Out Of First Place, 5 Games Out Of The Wild Card

Im not ready to write off the 2010 Red Sox just yet.

The fact that Victor Martinez will be back tonight, Pedroia will play again this season and the rest of the walking wounded will eventually come back by the end of the season means there is a possibility that they will put together a playoff push.

But Im also the kinda guy who buys scratch tickets and really believes Im going to win a million dollars.

Gillette Stadium Flawless In Stadium Food Safety Inspections

ESPNs Outside The Lines ranked NFL stadiums by percentage of stadium food vendors suffering "critical violations" in recent inspections and the Patriots are ranked number one with zero critical violations (ESPN article here).

They were the only stadium to not have a critical violation. (No spygate jokes, please.)



Anyway, it’s a sharp contract to to Fenway Park, who back in 2008 had 15 health code violations on opening day (Fenway Park Failed Health Inspections On Opening Day...story broke in June).

VIDEO: Glen Big Baby Davis Dancing to "Teach Me How To Dougie”

Posting a video of yourself on youtube dancing seems like something weirdos do. Not professional athletes.

Well, I guess Glen Big Baby Davis is more of a weirdo than a professional athlete.

The bright side is that this is a video of a young pro athlete having fun and NOT a video of a young pro athlete beating someone up at a strip club or doing anything illegal.

Anyway, without further adieu, heres the video of Glen Big Baby Davis dancing to the song "Teach Me How To Dougie.”

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Two City Employees Sold Marijuana To Undercover Cop At Revere Beach Saturday

Nice to see that Revere Beach is as ghetto as ever.

The funniest part of this story is that some lady who “goes to Revere Beach often” told WHDH, “I wouldn’t want to bring my kids here if I knew this was like a drug spot.”

What?

Anyone who thinks there aren’t illegal things going on at Revere Beach obviously hasn’t lived in this area very long.

New Zealand Team Named "Tall Blacks" Wants Kendrick Perkins

New Zealand's Tall Black assistant coach Dillon Boucher has gone on record as saying Celtics center Kendrick Perkins was "on their radar as a prospective member of the national squad" according to the Waikato Times.

But as quickly as that story broke, Kendrick Perkins' father came out and said that Kendrick will never play for the New Zealand Tall Blacks.

Im not even going to touch this one.

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Former Red Sox OF (and $66 Million Dollar Man) Jason Bay Benched By Mets For Poor Performance. Arent You Glad We Didnt Sign This D-Bag

Jason Bay is batting .257 with 44 RBIs and 6 home runs on the season (he is batting an anemic .169 in July) and it that manager Jerry Manuel is fed up.

Bay was benched for last nights game against the Dodgers.

Last season with the Red Sox he was THE POWER in the middle of the Red Sox line up, hitting 36 homers and driving in 119.

Kinda peculiar that he performed so well with the Red Sox and is sucking so badly for the Mets.

What has changed?  Well for one thing, last season he was in the final year of his contract.  This season he is in the first year of a four-year $66M contract with the Mets.

He seems to be fitting the profile of the typical player in the first year of a huge contract--unmotivated and lethargic. 

I mean, if he averages 50 home runs and 200 RBI over the next four years, he gets his $66 million.  If he averages 10 home runs and 60 RBI over the next four years, he gets his $66 million.

Jason Bay knows that he is going to get paid no matter how he performs. The only incentive for him to put up good number for the first three years of this contract is to preserve any dignity he has left…and he doesnt even seem motivated to do that.  What a dick.

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Congratulations Jeremy Roenick (aka the best player in NHL 94 for SEGA)

Congrats to Jeremy Roenick who officially got elected to the Hall Of Fame yesterday (AP).




He was THE BEST player in NHL 94....hands down!!!!

MA Men: A Mad Men Spoof Starring A Bunch Of Massholes

Looks like Joey McIntyre and his crew made another spoof of Mad Men. This one is called "MA Men 2."

Its basically a bunch of Massholes sitting around a room trying to come up with a new “time to make the donuts” guy for Dunkin Donuts.

Its not as funny as the original, but it made me laugh. Anything with massholes in it makes me laugh really.


MA Men 2 starring Joey McIntyre, Drew Antzis, JChaff, and Antonio Scarlata

MA Men 2

MA Men (the original) starring Joey McIntyre, Drew Antzis, JChaff, and Antonio Scarlata

MA Men

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ID LIKE TO PUNCH THIS FACE: Dan Duquette

Its been exactly one week since Dan Duquette took a shot at Roger Clemens saying:

“I think there is more information and evidence that will show that Roger used performance enhancing drugs in a significant way.”

[insert crickets chirping sound effect]

Hey Dan, we’re waiting.

Maybe Roger Clemens was right when he tweeted the following:

Maybe Dan Duquette really is just a tool who was looking to get his name in the paper.

Its called follow-up journalism. If you tell us there is more to the story, then you better damn well back it up.

Im not going to defend Roger Clemens. I think he is a disgrace and scum of the earth. But I think Dan Duquette just proved that he is right there with Roger in the gutter.

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Why The Frig Is Marc Savard Still A Bruin???

Boy I must be in a pissy mood today because I just ripped Dan Duquette now Im going after Peter Chiarelli.

Remember back in the “ol days” when Peter Chiarelli said he was looking to trade Marc Savard.

Um...what ever happened to that novel idea?

Why is Marc Savard, and Tim Thomas for that matter, still on this team?

If Marc Savard is a Bruin on opening night, it will be devastating to the chemistry of the Bruins. It will be worse than when the Red Sox failed to trade Nomar Garciaparra after MONTHS of talking about trading him.

When the Bruins drafted Tyler Seguin, we began to hear rumblings that the Bruins were looking to trade Marc Savard.

We heard rumblings that Cam Neely wasn't a fan of Marc Savard and that he was someone behind the idea of trading Savard.

Why is Marc Savard still a Bruin?  Your guess is as good as mine.  There is a chance that after making it known publicly that they were shopping Savard, the Bruins simply couldnt find a suitable trade partner.

Thats right.  After putting his name out there and having him name the two teams that he would waive his no-trade clause for, the Bruins simply couldnt get a deal done.

Um...what would you do if your boss basically wrote out a pink slip for you, asked you to empty out your desk and then didnt follow through?

Would you show up to work a happy camper?  Training camp will be very interesting this year.

Red Sox May Add $10M Scoreboard To Fenway Park...And People Are Bitching And Moaning About It

Only in Boston would people bitch and moan when their sports team makes a major upgrade for THEM.

The Red Sox are considering replacing their ancient center field jumbotron with a $10 million scoreboard and you have GOT TO see some of the feedback they are getting.

If you think Red Sox fans have become content from winning two World Series in the past decade and making the playoffs 6 out of the past 7 years, think again.

Red Sox fans are still as negative as ever. Still as pissy as ever. And still as miserable as ever.

Here are the first few comments left on the Boston.com article about the new scoreboard:

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Welcome Back Jed Lowrie. While You Were Gone, Red Sox Tried To Trade You To Rockies For Chris Iannetta And Got Turned Down!

Peter Gammons reported on his twitter account that the Colorado Rockies rejected a trade that would have sent Jed Lowrie to the Rockies for Rockies catcher Chris Iannetta.

The Red Sox will activate Lowrie on Wednesday morning.

WELCOME BACK JED LOWRIE!!!!