PETA Bought A Fenway Brick With A Hidden Message. They Are So Friggin Annoying.



From CBSBoston:
The organization said on its website that it managed to sneak a subliminal message into the brick it purchased.  The brick reads “Lead Our Bo Sox To Early Runs! Late Inning Blasts! Easy Routs! A Trophy In Our Name!  The acronym is “LOBSTER LIBERATION."
Putting a Lobster Liberation brick inside Fenway Park?  Cmon.  That is the height of douchebaggery and isnt going to get their message across.  Their marketing department is just a bunch of dickheads.

People in New England have been eating lobsters for hundreds of years.  Now a bunch of stuck up, fucktards think its their business to tell the people of New England to "liberate lobsters?" 

Seriously.  They are just being assholes.  There is a way to get your message out there without pissing people off.  These pricks know that and they choose to piss people off.  Anyone going to a Red Sox game, please do me a favor.  Buy a lobster roll, eat it, then puke it up on this brick and send me a picture.  Ill post it and you will be my hero.

And they had to use a hidden message?  Friggin losers.  If they had the hookup like me, they wouldnt have to use a hidden message.  Here's my brick:





Thats Three Wins In A Row, Bitches


I think its safe to say the Laser Show is back.  Dustin Pedroia has now homered in three of his last five games.  His 2 run homer in the sixth on Monday night broke a 2-2 tie and the Red Sox never looked back on their way to a 7-3 win over the Tigers.

This may just be an incredible coincidence, but the Red Sox have not lost a game since Terry Francona visited the Red Sox clubhouse (Saturday afternoon in New York).  Suck a dick, Bobby V!

But seriously, Bobby Valentine must feel like such a friggin loser right now. Think about it. How would you feel if your wife's ex husband visited and she suddenly came to life in the bedroom? Man, that has got to suck.

Anyway,  so back to the game.  Clay Buchholz only allowed 2 runs and 5 hits over eight innings and is now 5-1 with a 2.43 era in his last eight starts.  He is making Beckett and Lester look like real assholes.

So the Red Sox have won 3 games in a row, including 2 of 3 from the mighty New York Yankees.  They have some momentum going right now.  Gee, I wonder who is pitching tomorrow.  Fucking Beckett!  I dont mean to be a Debbie Downer, but history says he is going to piss all over the Red Sox momentum.  Stay tuned.



So Does This Mean The Red Sox Wont Trade Josh Beckett?

















Ok, I get it.  The Red Sox wont trade Josh Beckett.  No need to rub it in.  Christ Almighty.


REPORT: Josh Beckett Is On The Trading Block...And I Have A Pants Tent.



From ESPNBoston:
One major league executive insisted Sunday night that the team is looking for a buyer for starting pitcher Josh Beckett. "They're trying to dump him,'' the executive said, "but I don't think anyone would touch him without a big discount."

Also, Jeff Passan of Yahoo Sports is reporting that within the past 48 hours, the Red Sox have attempted to "dump Josh Beckett" on the Rangers and Braves.

So the Red Sox are willing to pay some of his salary to get him off this team.  Jesus H Christ, this guy must be toxic in that clubhouse.  Anyway, dump the bastid!  I dont care what the Red Sox get in return or how much they have to pay.  This man is costing the Red Sox wins and has to go.

He absolutely sucks (especially in the first inning of games) and seems to come to the ball park unprepared and unmotivated.  The Red Sox offense gets a case of limp dick anytime he takes the mound and he is hurting the team.

Thanks for 2007, Josh, now go away.  Take that friggin bottle opener that is attached to your locker with you and dont expect the Red Sox to have a "Josh Beckett" day anytime soon...or ever.  Bye.


I Bet Peter Gammons Feels Like A Dick Right Now

This is a tweet I sent to Peter Gammons back in May regarding Josh Beckett (and the response I got):

Well, it turns out that being a grumpy asshole does translate into lack of effort, lack of focus and general disinterest in winning.  And Josh Beckett is on the verge of being dumped because of said asshole-ism.

I was right and Peter Gammons and his Baseball Hall of Fame ring were just sipping the Kool-Aid that Ben Cherington and Larry Lucchino happened to be serving that day.

If your keeping score at home, its: Masshole 1, Gammons 0.



Red Sox Take 2 Of 3 Against The Yankees. We Can All Take A Deep Breath And Step Away From The Tobin Now.



Watching Felix Doubront make the Yankees look like a bunch of little bitches was friggin sweet.  The dude only allowed 1 run and 4 hits in 6.1 innings while striking out 8.  And Pedro Ciriaco once again got the game winning hit against the mighty New York Yankees.  This guy is pissa.  I mean, he's not David Ortiz clutch, but he has a knack for pissing on the Yankees.

Im not enough of a yahoo to say that the Red Sox are "back in it" but it felt good taking 2 of 3 against these bitches.  To think that the mighty New York Yankees could only win one game against the Red Sox does help me sleep better at night.

The Red Sox finished the road trip 3-3 and are now 51-51 on the season and 4 games back in the Wild Card.  Four games back isnt insurmountable so dont sleep on this team.

I mean, if Lester and Beckett can get their heads out of their asses down the stretch the Sox can get right back into this thing.  But if my aunt had a dick, she'd be my uncle.

Anyway, the Red Sox took 2 of 3 against the New York Yankees and we got to see Bobby V get ejected.  Not a bad weekend, people.



Hey, A Win Is A Win


I dont give a shit that the Red Sox gave up a five run lead.  I dont give a shit that Mark Teixeira hit a game tying home run off of Vincente Padilla.  I just dont care.  In the ninth inning, the overrated twat Curtis Granderson misplayed a Pedro Ciriaco fly ball and cost the Yankees the game...and it felt so friggin good.

Adrian Gonzalez went 3 for 5, including a home run, with four rbi and Will Middlebrooks went 2 for 3 with 2 rbi.

Pitching for his life, Jon Lester was mediocre, allowing 4 runs in 6 innings.  If he had thrown another stinker he was probably going to get buried in the minors with Daniel Bard or traded for a couple of nobodies like Kevin Youkilis.  But he did just enough to give the Red Sox reason to not send him packing.  And thats kinda a shame.  I kinda wanted to see the dude disappear.  Whatever.


A Timeline Of Wally's "Kidnapping"

At approximately 2:10pm on Friday, the Boston Police Department first reported that Wally the Green Monster had been stolen/kidnapped.



At approxiamately 2:30pm a ransom note first surfaced:



Approxiamately twenty minutes after the ransom note first appeared, the Boston Police Department reported that Wally had been found, unharmed.


It should be noted that Josh Beckett was not traded. Also, according to BostonPDnews.com, "officers were informed by detectives the monster was located and was in the custody of an authorized Red Sox employee. No arrests have been made the case is closed."

Um...if this was some sort of publicity stunt, Im going to be wicked pissed.  Stay tuned...


The 2012 Patriots Yearbook Cover Has Me All Fired Up. I Am So Friggin Ready For The Season To Begin.


Looking at this makes me want to go apeshit.  I want to flip tables, break windows and spike the closest object to me.  I am so goddamn ready for this season to begin...I cannot take it anymore!!!


The Opening Ceremony For The Olympics Is Tonight! You Know What That Means?



That means two weeks of looking at Lisa giving head to Bart. Seriously, whoever created the official logo for the Olympics ought to be fired...then sued.

And Im not the only sick bastid who noticed the resemblance.  If you do a search for "Olympic logo," the first suggested search is for Lisa Simpson.  I shit you not.





(VIDEO) Tosh.0 Takes On The Bob Kraft / Ricki Lander Audition Tape. Get Ready To Cringe.


Well, you knew this was coming.  Daniel Tosh superimposed himself into the Bob Kraft / Ricki Lander audition tape...and made the video a thousand times more embarrassing.

Best line: "It'll take a handfull of pills to get that ancient hog up."
Worst line: "Dont you have to get that camera down to whatever training camp your spying on this week?"




Mark Your Calenders Kids. The Heat Come To Town January 27th.



The NBA released its schedule yesterday.  On January 27th Ray Allen will play at the Garden for the first time as a member of the Miami Heat.  It will be really interesting to see if fans treat him like a hero or an asshole.

One one hand, he was a huge part of the Celtics winning the championship in 2008.  But on the other hand, he turned his back on his teammates and Celtics fans because he didnt like Danny Ainge...and even the Ray Allen apologists among us have to agree that was selfish, immature and kinda douchey.

Honestly, I have no idea how this is going to go down.  I can see fans giving him a standing ovation but at the same time I can see him getting booed every time he touches the ball.  Stay tuned folks, it should be interesting.



In Honor Of Patriots Training Camp Opening Yesterday, How About Some Awesome Patriots Tattoos


Rob Gronkowski tattoo




Bill Belichick tattoo




Um....a Danny Woodhead tattoo





Tim Thomas "Stands With" Chick-fil-A On Their Anti Gay Stance. Cmon Timmy, Take Your Head Out Of Your Ass.

Tim Thomas posted this on his Facebook page today:



I understand that Tim Thomas is an anti-government, libertarian but now Im starting to think he just likes pissing people off.  Everyone knows that Chick-Fil-A's stance is bigoted and hate filled.

And dont give me that bullshit that they are simply being faithful to their religion.  Cmon, that is complete and utter bullshit.  Anyone who filters through the countless messages in the bible then picks and chooses what to believe needs to grow the fuck up.

And someone has to tell Tim Thomas to take his head out of his ass and grow up too.  The dude has to stop the "rebellious teenager" act.  We're getting tired of it.  Wait, he quit on his teammates and basically told the fans to screw.  Why am I even talking about him as if he's relevant in this town anymore?


Oh Shit...Rob Gronkowski Is Getting His Own Reality Show.


Darren Rovell tweeted this yesterday.  Please tell me this isnt true.  Isnt this how Ochocinco disappeared into the depths of sucktitude?  Wasnt it his stupid reality show with Terrell Owens that sorta took his focus away from football?

Christ Almighty, I just want Gronk to go out there and play football.  I mean, I understand he is a really interesting guy and I would love to live vicariously through him but Id rather see him just focus on football.  There is no need for this bullshit

Here is what I imagine a Gronkowski reality show would be like:




SHOCKA! Red Sox Lose 2 Of 3 To Rangers.



I called it a few days ago. I said that every Josh Beckett (and Jon Lester) start will be automatic losses from here on out. The dude absolutely, unequivocally sucks.

Sure, he "only" gave up 5 runs, but he blew a two run lead in the 4th inning and blew the lead again in the 7th with a wild pitch. Now I understand why the Red Sox offense sometimes gets a case of limp dick when he is pitching.  Its got to be tough getting it up knowing that the dude is just going to squander it.

Will Middlebrooks and Dustin Pedroia each hit solo home runs, so they deserve a nice golf clap, but the Red Sox only had 5 hits overall.

I dont mean to be a Debbie Downer, but the A's, Angels, Tigers, Rays and White Sox all won on Wednesday night.  So the Red Sox have sunk a little deeper into the abyss.  On the bright side, Patriots Training Camp opens on Thursday!

The Red Sox Are Back Below .500



The Red Sox are now 49-50.  I feel bad for this guy, I really do. Its not his fault, yet when the Red Sox dont make the playoffs, he will most likely be the fall guy.

I dont know how Jon Lester and Josh Beckett can sleep at night knowing what kind of hell they are putting this poor bastid through.  Those arrogant son of a bitches.



This Is Wes Welker "Showing Off'" His New Hair. Ugh. That Dr Leonard Dude Is A Friggin Quack.

photo via TerezOwens.com


I love Wes Welker and I wash his balls with the proper care they deserve 364 days out of the year, but today I must say: the dude should ask for a refund.  I mean, what the frig did he pay for?  Sure his hair is thick, but he still has a Joe Buck forehead.

He should have spent the money on a nice collection of scally caps.  That Dr Leonard dude is quack.



Nope, NESN Doesnt Have The Balls To Predict A 16-0 Season

After Pete Prisco of CBS Sports came out with his NFL predictions, which included the Patriots going 16-0, I began to wonder if other media outlets would have such big brass balls.

Well, it turns out our very own NESN doesnt have the sack.



Pussies.