Looks Like The Former Princess Of Red Sox Nation, Heidi Watney, Got A Boob Job...And Thats Friggin Awesome, Kid!

First of all, good for Heidi Watney.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with getting a little augmentation.  Hell, Wes Welker recently got hair implants.  If you have the money, why the hell not.

Anyway, I hope Heidi doesnt get mad at me for pointing this out, but here is the side by side.  The picture on the left is from a few years back when Heidi Watney was a NESN sideline reporter.  The picture on the right is from just a few days ago.

All I can say is, "thank you Heidi!"  Oh yea, and I wish Heidi Watney was still with NESN.  Not because of her boob job, but because Jenny Dell friggin suuuuucks.

Follow Masshole Sports On Facebook     |    Follow Masshole Sports on Twitter

And In Last Nights Episode Of "The Shit Show," The Red Sox Get Swept By Angels And Drop To An Amazing 8 Games Below .500

Gonzalez, Crawford and Beckett are gone and they still play like they dont give a shit nightly. Everyone thought eliminating the asshole-ism that those guys brought to the clubhouse nightly would change this, but it didnt.

2013 will be year one of their rebuild but for now, we just have to sit through this bullshit nightly.  Im looking forward to seeing guys like Jose Iglesias, Ryan Kalish, et al next season.  But for now Im just going to keep on busting their balls nightly.

Your Photoshop Of The Day

So, before the Patriots Giants game the other night, @Patriots tweeted this picture. My first thought was, "Tom Brady looks like a goofy bastid."  My next thought was, "Im going to photoshop the shit out of this." So here we go:

Tom Brady about to take out Kenny Chesney for making a "Welkah" shirt look douchey:

Tom Brady at the Republican National Convention about to do us all a favor and push Clint Eastwood off the friggin stage:

Tom Brady about to the world a favor and push Bobby Valentine:

Tom Brady about to push a drunk Barack Obama:

Tom Brady about to push Josh Beckett out of a plane:

I can do more upon request.  Send me an email: info@massholesports.com.

NHL Unveils 2012 TV Schedule And Teases The Shit Out Of Hockey Fans. Bastids.

All signs point towards an NHL lockout, yet the NHL still decided yesterday to unveil their national tv schedule and tease the shit out of us.  What the frig is that all about?  Why not just keep the info low key.

Now my mind is on the lockout and I dont want it to be.  Ive been blocking the NHL out of my mind for the past few months because I dont want to know if there may or may not be a lockout.  I just want to close my eyes and I want it to be October 11th.

Gary Bettman is being a real dickhead right now.  He isnt thinking about the fans.  I understand that the NHL is a business, but the NFL took their collective heads out of their asses and saved the season last year.  The owners sucked it up and didnt get their 18 game schedule and you know what?  The friggin world didnt end.

Gary Bettman and those spoiled brat owners better finds a way to cut a friggin deal.  Now Im all pissed off.  This is why Ive been blocking this shit out of my mind.

Suck It, Ochocinco. Suck It Hard!

I have to be totally honest, I am friggin loving this.  Ochocinco aka Chad Johnson basically stole money from the Patriots in 2011 and shat all over Patriots fans.  The Karma he is receiving right now is so friggin appropriate.  I hope his ego shrinks to the size of Jose Canseco's testicles.

And In The Latest Episode Of "The Shit Show," The Red Sox Take A 10-3 Ass Pounding Courtesy Of The LA Angels.

I am so glad I went to bed early last night. The Patriots game put me in a catatonic state and I was knocked out by 11:00. Thank the lawd! I didnt have to witness the Red Sox getting their ass handed to them.

I feel bad for this poor kid Zach Stewart, I really do. He's the pitcher the Red Sox got in the Kevin Youkilis deal. The dude allowed 9 earned runs in only 3 innings.  He's the first Red Sox pitcher since 1903 to allow 9 runs in his Red Sox debut.  This guy fits right into this shit show. 

By the way, he has already been sent to Pawtucket to make room for Daniel Bard.

Anyway, by the end of the third inning last night, it was 9-1.  Im going to guess 99.9% of Red Sox fans went to bed at that point.  The ones who didnt should seek psychiatric counseling.

Im Sorry, I Just Cannot Get Into Preseason Football. It Is So Friggin Pointless.

People keep sending me emails bitching about how I shouldnt write about the Red Sox anymore and about how its football season now. Well, Im sorry I just cannot get into preseason football. I tried to watch the entire game last night but was falling asleep by the third quarter.  And Im a night owl.  Im usually up until at least 1am.

Anyway, know-it-alls will say that there was plenty to watch for. Bullshit. The three quarters I watched last night showed me absolutely nothing. N-O-T-H-I-N-G.  It really doesnt matter who the Patriots fifth string running back is or how well the backup quarterback plays.  It just doesnt matter.

I should have used that two and a half hours to catch up with some old DVR'd episodes of Family Guy.  That would have made for a friggin awesome night.

Yea, Buuuuudy

Further Proof The Season Is In The Shitter: Daniel Bard Will Be Activated Thursday

The Red Sox will activate Daniel Bard on Thursday.  You remember him, right?  He was the heir apparent to Jonathan Papelbon until Larry Lucchino turned him into a starter and screwed up his head.

Before being sent to the minors and left to die, Bard was 4-6 with a 5.30 ERA.  In Pawtucket, he was even worse. In 31 games (yes, its been THAT long) he had a 7.03 ERA...against minor leaguers.

Not sure why they want to bring him up and further subject him to the mental anguish of sucking in the big leagues, but whatever. 

Awwwwe Shit! We Have A Shortstop Controversy!

As if anyone gives two shits.

(VIDEO) Madden 13 Simulator Predicts Patriots Will Face Bears In Super Bowl And Brady Will Tie TD Record...And I Now Have A Pants Tent

See, Im not a homer. Im smart just like a computer. The Madden 13 simulator predicts that Tom Brady will tie his single season touch down record of 50, be named league MVP and the Patriots will make it to the Super Bowl.

I love this shit because it proves that Im not a yahoo for washing Tom Bradys balls every week.  Even computers think Tom Brady is a God.

Rob Gronkowski Is On The Cover Of The Sports Illustrated NFL Preview Issue. Wicked Pissa, Kid.

You Cant Make This Shit Up!

If you've been living under a rock and dont know, on Friday night Alfredo Aceves was suspended by the Red Sox for three days for slamming the door in Bobby Valentines office and ripping off his shirt after Andrew Bailey closed a game instead of him.

Yea, the guy basically went ape shit because he didnt close the game.  Fast forward to last night.  His suspension was over and the dude was brought in in the 9th with the Red Sox up 5-4 and ended up shitting the bed.  The Angels won on a sacrifice fly by Torii Hunter and Aceves got his league leading eight blown save of the year...and the shit show rolls on.

Why the frig does this dude even want to be the closer.  Doesnt he realize he sucks?  Doesnt he realize he would be better off in the middle relief role?  Jesus.  If you have the balls to throw a hissy fit and slam the door to Bobby V's office, at least friggin deliver.

What a friggin loser.  The dude just lost me.  I had admired him for his honesty and effort, but when you pull bullshit like he did, you have to execute.  Otherwise, youre just another piece of shit on a team full of underachieving cry babies.

Joe Mauer Placed On Waivers. DONT FRIGGIN DO IT LARRY!!!

The Twins have placed Joe Mauer on waivers and the Red Sox front office must be friggin drooling right now. This will be a good test of their will.

Mauer is a catcher / first baseman / DH and due $23 million per year through 2018.  He has name recognition and is very marketable.  You know Larry Lucchino has a boner right now. The question is, can he keep it in his pants.

The Red Sox of old may have jumped at this chance. But they say they are going in a different direction. They say they are going to be more economical with their money. We'll see.

I personally have no problem watching a team full of Cody Ross' and Pedro Ciriaco's every night than spoiled rich kids with name reckognition.  Screw NESN and the ratings. Screw sports talk radio. Screw the sellout streak.  If the Red Sox do jump this dudes bones, they will be taking about 10 steps backwards.  Lets cross our fingers.

Ive Found The Most Naïve Bastid On Gods Green Earth

Oh, the innocence.  Someday they'll get it out there in La La land.

Update:  turns out this T.J. Simers guy was being sarcastic with this tweet.  He interviewed Beckett after the game and Beckett was being a wicked dick to him.  Heres the audio via WEEI.

Josh Beckett Gets The Loss In 10-0 Ass Pounding. Hey LA: He's Yours Now, Bitches!

Josh Beckett wasnt horrible in his Dodgers debut, giving up 3 runs and 7 hits over 5.2 innings, but he did get the loss.  And in the end, the Dodgers lost 10-0. 

It was kinda funny to see Beckett get literally, no run support.  Maybe they know he is a prick or something.  I mean, the Red Sox offense seemed to get limp dick alot when he pitched.  I dont think its a coincidence.

And how ironic is it that Adrian Gonzalez (the prize of the blockbuster trade) hits a home run in his first at bat as a Dodger and Josh Beckett (the toxic throw-in) gives up a home run to the first batter he faces?  That is friggin hilarious.

Its times like these when I think there really are Baseball Gods.

STUNNING!!! Dice K Can All Of A Sudden Pitch!!!

Dice K went seven innings and only allowed one run on five hits on Monday.  Gee, I wonder if he would have given us that kind of performance if he wasnt going to be a free agent at the end of the season.  Doubt it.

Its amazing what pending free agency does to a guy.  All of a sudden the dude knows how to pitch.

I wonder if he feels any shame or guilt for sucking over the past two years...or is he cocky enough to not let that stuff bother him.

Sorry to sound so negative.  It just kinda pisses me off seeing Dice K all of a sudden turn it on when the Red Sox need him least.  Anyway, so I guess for the rest of the season, we are going to see Dice K auditioning for a new contract.  I think I may have found my new whipping boy.

Awe Shit, Kid! Josh Beckett Is Starting Cat Fights On Twitter.

What the frig was that?  Seriously, what the frig was that?  Catherine Varitek is a Josh Beckett fan?

If this lady wants her husband to be the next manager of the Red Sox she better start bashing Beckett like every other human being on the planet (other than the Dodgers front office).

The Red Sox need Jason Varitek as their next manager.  What they dont need is to know that he is friends with a douche like Beckett.  The dude is toxic.

Adrian Gonzalez Says Boston Media Didnt Like Him Because He Was A "Calm Person" And Didnt Use "Bad Words." This Dude Is Friggin Wierd.

From the LA Times:
As for why the Boston media didn't take to him, he said, "They didn't like that I was a calm person. I won't throw my helmet, I won't scream, I won't use bad words if I strike out. That's what they want over there."
Thats bullshit.  The reason the media was hard on him is because he sucked for most of this season.  Last season when he was tearing the shit out of the ball, the media wasnt critical of him.  He wasnt being badgered every day.

This dude is just weird.  He makes $20 million a year, thinks the Red Sox September collapse was a part of "Gods plan" and wore a Mickey Mouse shirt on the day he was introduced as a Dodger.

Now he's saying that the media didnt like him because he didnt use bad words?  Okay dude.  Whatever you say.

Josh Beckett Is Going To Destroy That Dodgers Clubhouse...And They Have No Friggin Idea.

I find it hilarious that the Dodgers have absolutely no clue how toxic Josh Beckett is.  He is going to destroy that friggin clubhouse.  Mark my words.  The dude had a bottle opener attached to his locker that says "First Class White Trash" for christs sake.

When Terry Francona said that he had "lost influence with some former team leaders" in the Red Sox clubhouse prior to the September collapse of 2011, he was talking about Beckett.

Towards the end of the 2011 season, it was Beckett who turned the Red Sox pitching staff into a bunch of lazy, unmotivated pricks.  They gained weight, they ate fried chicken and beer in the clubhouse and the march into the gutter was led by the former great pitcher known as Josh Beckett.  What makes people think the LA clubhouse is immune to his bullshit.

He is a drinker, an asshole and douchebag of the highest order.  Sure, he may actually be motivated by the change of scenery and may actually prepare for games out there in LA, unlike he had in Boston for the past few months.  He may actually get out of the first inning without giving up four to six runs.

But assholeism is real and is contagious. And when that clubhouse sees this dude drinking beers in the clubhouse on his off days like a fratboy and staying out until closing time at the local dive bar, you know some of the guys in that locker room are going to follow his lead.

We thought Lester and Buchholz were immune to it.  Turns out they werent.  Stay tuned to see if the Dodgers can ignore Becketts douchebaggery and win despite him.

Red Sox Beat The Kansas City Royals. How About A Nice Golf Clap.

So the Red Sox are now 1-1 in their "Money Ball Era."  Not too shabby.  From here on out they are probably going to lose more than they win, but they sucked with the lazy, unmotivated, overpaid slobs so whats the difference?

I like this new era of Red Sox.  Ill be honest, going forward I probably wont be so enraged when they lose.  Call me soft if you want, but knowing Beckett is not in that locker room makes me feel good about this team even when they lose.

Anyway, so about the game.  We got to see Bobby V lose his shit, which was pretty cool.  Pedro Ciriaco went 3 for 5 with a home run, Dustin Pedroia went 2 for 5 with a home run and the Red Sox actually came from behind to win...after Bobby V went apeshit on first base umpire Dan Bellino for a blown call.

Im not saying they won because Bobby V went apeshit, but I think it definitely sent a message and set a tone among the players.  Especially considering it was on a play involving Pedroia.  Maybe, just maybe he can win back the clubhouse...not that it matters at this point.

(VIDEO) Bobby Valentine Goes Apeshit On First Base Umpire Dan Bellino

Because MLB sucks and wont let me embedd the video, I have to post a link to it instead.  So click here to watch Bobby Valentine go apeshit on first base umpire Dan Bellino after he clearly blows a call.

ESPN Says The Dodgers Are Now The "Favriots" To Win The World Series. Is That A Subliminal Message Or What?

If the Dodgers do win the World Series, we will no doubt see riots in the streets of LA which makes me think this is either a subliminal message or some smartass headline writer trying to be funny.  Or maybe the dumbass at ESPN who wrote it just didnt notice the little red squiggly spell check line under favriot.

Whatever the case, as of right now, it hasnt been corrected.