Meanwhile, In Aaron Hernandez News



From Boston.com:
Former New England Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez discussed the murder of the man he is charged with killing, Odin L. Lloyd, in telephone calls recorded at the Bristol County jail, prosecutors allege in court papers.
The information, they said, will show that Hernandez used code words when talking with friends, and that he has talked about the allegation made by prosecutors that he orchestrated the murder.

Both detainees and the person they call are warned by the jail that their conversations are being recorded. 

Prosecutors said that those who have visited Hernandez inlcude his fiancee, Shayanna Jenkins, and cousin, Tanya Cummings Singleton, both of whom are facing charges themselves connected to the Lloyd homicide investigation.

Im not even going to write any wise ass commentary about this stupid son of a bitch. This guy is so friggin stupid I am speechless.


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This Broncos Super Bowl Song Has To Be The Most Pathetic Fan Song Of All Time



If you think this is a spoof, it isnt.  Read some of the comments on Youtube. People arent laughing at this song...they are actually into it.  Broncos fans are so friggin pathetic.







FINAL: Canadiens 4 Bruins 1



How the frig do you score six goals in three straight games then score one goal against a backup goalie?  That game pissed me off.







This Pretty Much Sums It Up.









Some Guy Video Bombed Wes Welker At The Celtics Knicks Game The Other Night With The Universal "Choke" Sign.



If this were a couple of years ago, Id be pissed.  But Ill be honest...I laughed.







The Bruins Are Playing The Canadiens Tonight. Here Are The Projected Lineups.



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ESPN Anonymously Polled Current NFL Players And The Results Speak For Themselves...

via ESPN


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The Celtics Lost Again Last Night And Kris Humphries Says He Stays Positive By Going Home And 'Hanging Out With Animals.'

Listen at the 1:34 mark when a reporter asks Kris Humphries how he stays positive through such a sucky season (not in those words) and he responds by saying, "if you have animals, you go home and hang out with them."

The Celtics have only won 3 of their last 22 games...and I think the players are slowly losing their friggin minds.








Your Celtics Stat Of The Day










VIDEO: Tim Thomas Says He Would've Had More Fun Watching The State Of The Union Than Playing Against The Bruins. Well Hardy Fucking Har Har.




After the game, a reporter asked Tim Thomas if he had fun playing against the Bruins.  He sarcastically said that he would have rather watched the State of the Union.  Then he followed up by saying, "probably not."

What is this, middle school?  Seriously, I dont think Ive ever heard anyone over the age of 12 make a "not" joke.


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FINAL: Bruins 6 Panthers 2



Honestly, this game went about how I expected it. In his return to the Garden, Tim Thomas ran into probably the hottest team in the NHL right now and allowed a season high six goals. Sucks to be him. The Bruins have now scored 6 goals in each of their last three games and are 5-0-1 in their last six games.

Not only did Tim Thomas get bitch slapped pretty good, but the fans at the Garden actually started chanting, "thom-as, thom-as" at one point (after he let in his fifth goal). My how things have changed.

David Krejci, Reilly Smith, Shawn Thornton, Zdeno Chara and Milan Lucic (2) all scored for the Bruins. Zdeno Chara scored his 13th goal of the season, which tied him with Shea Weber for the most by a defenseman in the NHL.

The Bruins are playing their best hockey of the season and the Canadiens come to town on Thurday. I cannot friggin wait.


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FINAL: Bruins 6 Islanders 3


You read that correctly. 12 goals in their last two games. Holy shit. 

Six different guys scored for the Bruins last night--Brad Marchand, Patrice Bergergon, Reilly Smith, Loui Eriksson, Carl Soderberg and Zdeno Chara.

The Marchand-Bergeron-Smith line friggin dominated.  That line had a total of eight points last night. Brad Marchand is still on fire.  With his four points last night, the dude now has 12 points in his last six games. 

The Bruins have won three of their last four games, their offense is white hot right now and Tim Thomas and the pathetic Panthers come to the Garden tonight.  It should be interesting.






VIDEO: Carl Soderberg Scored A Highlight Reel Goal And Jack Edwards Had A Mini Sportsgasm









So, This Happened...



So yea, Mayor Walsh lost his bet with the Mayor of Denver.


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REPORT: Jerry Remy Will Return To The NESN Booth In 2014.



From NESN:
Jerry Remy informed the media Monday that he will be in the booth for his 27th season as a Boston Red Sox analyst for NESN. “We look forward to having Jerry back in the booth for the 2014 season,” NESN president and CEO Sean McGrail said. “It was a difficult personal decision for Jerry to make and all of us at NESN and the Red Sox are completely supportive of his return to our broadcast.”
Im not going to sit here and write some pseudo-sociological analysis.  The bottom line is some people are always going to associated Jerry Remy with his dickhead son.  And those people are always going to think Jerry should get out of the public eye and never broadcast another Red Sox game.

Im actually glad he's coming back. Sure, his son is a scumfuck, but that doesnt mean he deserves to be unemployed for the rest of his life.  It really is that simple.


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Are You Ready To Puke? Madden Simulation Has Broncos Beating The Seahawks And Winning The Super Bowl.

Every year, EA Sports does a Madden simulation of the Super Bowl and eight of the last ten years, they have been right. This years simulation has the Broncos beating the Seahawks in overtime.





If Madden turns out to be right this year, it means we will have to listen to all the Peyton Manning ball washers talk about how Manning is better than Brady (until Brady wins his next Super Bowl anyway).  I already feel like gauging my eyes out.



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That Paul Pierce Tribute Video Was Friggin Unreal.

If you live under a rock and dont know, Paul Pierce returned to the Garden on Sunday night for the first time since leaving the Celtics.  They played a video tribute during the first intermission and the crowd went absolutely apeshit.  Seriously, if you dont get the chills watching this, you dont have a pulse.






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The Kevin Garnett Tribute Video Was Pissa Too.












It Really Was Great Seeing Two Celtics Legends Return To The Garden And Get The Tribute They Deserve.



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And This Is Why Kevin Garnett Is Awesome

Kevin Garnett has mastered the art of trash talking...and busting balls.









FINAL: Bruins 6 Flyers 1





Coming into this game, Jarome Iginla had gone eight games without even scoring a point.  Yesterday, in the Bruins 6-1 ass kicking of the Flyers, he had two goals and two assists.  He was so friggin due for a game like this.



Reilly Smith and Patrice Bergeron each scored a goal and Zdeno Chara had two.  Those two goals were Chara's 10th and 11th of the season, so the Bruins now have eight 10 goals scorers.  Damn, this team is friggin deep.



The Bruins are now 3-0-1 in their last four games and are back tied with the Lightning for first place in the Atlantic Division.  Pissa.















If You Didnt Watch The Game Yesterday I Feel Bad For You Because You Missed This Friggin Awesome Save By Tuukka Rask









If You Didnt Watch The Game Yesterday You Also Missed Reilly Smith Making Two Flyers Defensemen Look Like Assholes

This is what I like to call a "pants tent inducing" goal.


Reilly Smith 2 on Make A Gif








I Love Gregory Campbell's Heart. I Love Gregory Campbell's Balls. But Why The Frig Does This Guy Fight?

According to my fight card, the dude is now 0-4 this season.









VIDEO: Yet Another "Bad Lip Reading" NFL Edition Has Hit The Internet

Prepare to laugh your balls off:





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Jon Lester Says He Would Take Less Money To Re-Sign With The Red Sox. In This Day And Age Of Greedy Pricks, That Is So Refreshing To Hear.



Jon Lester's contract is up after the 2014 season.  He could simply give the Red Sox front office the silent treatment like Jacoby Ellsbury did.  He could be a dick and refuse to discuss an extension, like Ellsbury.

But in a sharp contrast to that money grubbing whore, Lester was at the Baseball Writers' Association of America awards dinner last night and reiterated that he really wants to stay here and is willing to take less money to stay here.

From ESPNBoston:
Lester said he not only expects to have to take a discount in order to sign an extension with the team, but he is willing to do so.

"It's like Pedey [Dustin Pedroia, Red Sox second baseman]. He left a lot of money on the table to stay here. That's what he wanted to do. I understand that. That's my choice, that's his choice. I would hope they want me to stay here,'' Lester said. "Hopefully, we can get something done.
"These guys are my No. 1 priority.  I want to be here 'til they rip this jersey off my back."

Let's just hope the Red Sox front office does the right thing.  I mean, its not everyday that a left handed, top of the rotation starting pitcher falls on your lap like this.

Your move, Ben.


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The Latest Poll Results Are In...

via SportsNation

Seriously, Connecticut?  Fucking seriously?  Anyway, 46% of this country has no idea what the hell they are talking about.  The last time I checked, three is better than two.


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VIDEO: Matt LeBlanc Tried To Teach Conan O'Brien Massachusetts Slang And I Have No Friggin Idea What He Is Talking About.

Ive lived in Massachusetts my whole life and I know people from basically every part of this state. And I have no friggin clue what Matt LeBlanc is talking about. On a side note, if you try and explain Massachusetts slang and dont mention "wicked," "pissa" or "wicked pissa," you have failed.









Your Tweet Of The Day

@RedSox


I like the way Tom Glavine talks.  And I like the fact that the Red Sox used the word "pissed" in a tweet.  That pretty ballsy of them.







REPORT: Jonny Gomes Plans On Shaving His Beard.



From ESPNBoston:
When Jonny Gomes showed up for a Red Sox “town hall” event at Northeastern University Wednesday night, his beard was intact. But will it endure?

“No,” he said. “The beard’s coming off. Oh, yeah.”  Different year, different look.

“Like I mentioned before, baseball season is not like a cookie cutter,” he said. “You can’t win last year. I mean, it’s a clean slate, you know. 

Maybe Im a bit too superstitious or maybe Im just a too damn sentimental.  I just really dont want Jonny Gomes to shave his beard.

Those beards werent just a rallying cry last year.  I honestly, truly believe it this team it's mojo.  It was their totem.  Without that beard, who the hell is Jonny Gomes?  Who the hell are the Red Sox?

Sure, a lot of the guys shaved their beards after the World Series.  But if Jonny Gomes and Mike Napoli shave theirs, Im going to be friggin lost.

Speaking of Napoli, he went on a mini Twitter rant when he found out:

@MikeNapoli25


@MikeNapoli25

Let's hope Gomes gets the message.







The NFL Has Released A Video Explaining Why The Wes Welker Hit Was Legal. It Seems Like They Really Want To Shove Belichick's Words Up His Ass.




(NFL.com wont let me post the video here, so click here to see the video on NFL.com


From NFL.com:
"Bill Belichick called Wes Welker's block of Aqib Talib 'deliberate' and 'one of the worst plays (he'd) ever seen.' The NFL's take on the block that ended Talib's afternoon? Deliberate? Potentially. Dirty? Nope.

Thats a rather douchey way to open an article on the NFL's official website.

Anyway, I get the impression that they only made this video to make Belichick look like a dick.  They could have just issued a statement.  There was no need for the NFL's vice president of officiating to go on the NFL Network, stand in front of a huge flat screen tv and explained in detail why Bill Belichick was wrong.  That seems so douchey.

In the video, this guy Dean Blandino says the NFL has been in contact with Bill Belichick and that they still have a "difference of opinion."  Im going to guess Belichick told him that he was full of shit.  I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall during that conversation.

On a side note, Seahawks players have come out and said the Wes Welker hit was dirty and that they are "ready for his tactics." Maybe I will watch the Super Bowl after all...just to see Wes Welker take his medicine.







The Red Sox Have Reportedly Signed Outfielder Grady Sizemore. In Other News, Grady Sizemore Reportedly Really Likes Taking Shirtless Picture Of Himself.

So the Red Sox have signed Grady Sizemore.

This guy has had five major surgeries in the past four years--left knee surgery in 2010, hernia surgery in 2011, right knee surgery in 2011, back surgery in 2012 and right knee surgery yet again in 2012--and hasnt even played in the majors since 2011.

Sure, they got him relatively cheap ($750,000 for one year) and on an incentive laden contract, but this signing just doesnt make any sense.  The dude is the textbook definition of damages goods.

Im thinking the Red Sox only signed this guy in order to please the Pink Hats after Jacoby Ellsbury left.  I mean, the internet is plastered with shirtless selfies of this guy:











And here is a collage for all the female Massholes out there:




If you have any doubt that these pictures are really of Grady Sizemore, simple google: "Grady Sizemore shirtless."  They're him.

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Your Tweet Of The Day



Yup.







Tom Brady Says He Wont Be Watching The Super Bowl This Year And Isnt Rooting For Either Team. I Like His Honesty...And His Balls.



Tom Brady was on WEEI yesterday and was asked about the Super Bowl. He said:
“I don’t have much of a rooting interest, truthfully. Those games are hard to watch. I don’t see myself sitting down to enjoy a football game or watch it. Our season is over. Truthfully, I could care less about watching a game. That’s pretty much how I feel.”

I dont blame Brady for not wanting to watch.  Hell, Im not going to watch.  The Broncos and Seahawks have to be two of the most unlikeable teams in the NFL.

I cant even look at Peyton Manning and his huge forehead without wanting to punch a friggin wall.  The idea of him winning a Super Bowl and the ensuing ball washing from the national media is enraging.  And Richard Sherman is the epitome of douchebaggery.  The guy literally cannot get any douchier.  The idea of him holding up the Vince Lombardi Trophy literally makes my stomach turn.

And lets not forget, Pete Carroll basically lets his players use banned substances--10 Seahawks have been suspended for violating the NFL's substance abuse policy since he took over that team in 2010 for Christ's sake.  The fact that this enabler may win a Super Bowl is a disgrace.

People are hyping this up as a great game because its the NFL's best offense vs the NFL's best defense.  But the reality is, this Super Bowl is nothing more than a battle of douchebags.  And Im not even going to bother watching.  Neither will Tom Brady.


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MASSHOLE WEATHER ALERT










So, This Happened...

The paparazzi took pictures of a pissed off Tom Brady bringing in the groceries and taking out the trash today.

@TerezOwens

I feel your pain, Tom.  Believe me, I feel your pain.  Ive had a scowl on my face for the past day and a half and its not going away anytime soon.


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FINAL: Bruins 3 Kings 2



Im still pissy about the Patriots losing but Ill be honest, this game made me feel a little better.

Brad Marchand scored two goals, including a sportsgasmic short-handed goal, and the Bruins gave the Kings a nice kick in the balls.  Marchand now has six goals in his last four games.  This dude is friggin on fire.

Torey Krug had the other goal for the Bruins and Chad Johnson had 21 saves in the win.

The Bruins are now off until Saturday, when they have a matinee with the Flyers.  I dont know what the hell Im going to do with myself this week.






VIDEO: Jordan Nolan Took A Run At Torey Krug And Proceeded To Get His Ass Kicked By Milan Lucic. That Was Pissa.

Watch Jordan Nolan take a run at Torey Krug and then get his ass kicked by Milan Lucic:



On a side note, it was nice to hear Jack Edwards call out that baseball snob Peter Gammons. If you dont know, Peter Gammons tweeted that the NHL is a "minor sport" after the Flames and Canucks line brawl the other night.

Who the hell is Peter Gammons to put down the NHL?  Seriously, this guy has been sniffing baseball players' crotches for decades.  He hasnt earned the right to have an opinion on the NHL







FINAL: Broncos 26 Patriots 16



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The Latest Poll Results Are In. And Connecticut Can Go Straight To Hell. Im So Sick Of Their Bullshit.


I need to vent. I just want to verbally beat the shit out of someone. Well, welcome to ring, Connecticut.

Technically, you are a New England state. Technically. But the reality is, most of your sad excuse for a state is filled with Yankee and Giants fans.  Anytime one of these polls comes out (which are a good metrics for how people are feeling in this country) you twats dont support the hometown team.  That is a fact. 

And the fact is, you arent one of us.  You dont bleed Boston sports the way we do.  As far as Im concerned, Connecticut is no longer a part of New England.  That state is friggin dead to me.

I havent added anyone to my shit list in a while, but today I am officially adding the state of Connecticut to my shit list.  That means any chance I get, Im going to pounce on your ass and humiliate you with the venom of a pissed off Masshole.  Congratulations, dickheads.






After The Game, Aqib Talib Told A NY Post Columnist To "Get Out Of My Face, Motherfucker." That Makes Me Feel A Little Better.

So, I guess Aqib Talib was a little pissed after the game and took it out on a New York Post columnist. That's nice.

@HubbuchNYP









VIDEO: Julian Edelman Was In Damn Near Tears After The Game. I Think He Knows He Isnt Coming Back...And That Sucks.

Julian Edelman is headed for free agency.  And I get the feeling, based on how emotional he was after the game, that he isnt coming back.  Seriously, if the Patriots dont sign this dude, Im going to be pissed.










Patriots Broncos Keys To The Game










Your Tweet Of The Day




The next time anyone tells you Peyton Manning is better, read this tweet to them.  Then slap them in the face.






Patriots Fan Photo Of The Day



Remember, anyone could have bought tickets on the secondary market. Places like Stubhub and Ace Ticket dont discriminate like the Broncos do.  I really hope Patriots fans show up to this game and bust balls.






VIDEO: This Ode To Julian Edelman Is Friggin Weird.









Today Is The Anniversary Of The "Tuck Rule Game." Here It Is One More Time...For Old Times Sake.

Here is the call by the Oakland Raiders radio play by play announcers (it happens at the 1:10 mark). These tools were convinced it was a fumle.  Then at the 2:02 mark they realize the play is under review and one has the balls to ask, "why?"










The Denver Post Is Getting Douchier By The Day.

Earlier this week, the front page of the Denver Post's sports section had a headline calling Bill Belichick a "grump."  Well, this was the front page of the Denver Post sports section yesterday:

DenverPost.com

In the article, some douche named Mark Kiszla basically brags about how the Broncos wont let Massholes into their stadium. 

From DenverPost.com:
No offense to proper Bostonians or any wicked arrogant fan of the New England Patriots. But the Broncos do not want you here in Denver. The local NFL franchise did not give blood, sweat and tears all season long to surrender its home-field advantage to an invasion of loudmouths from New England. No chowderheads allowed.

One of the most magical rides in Denver sports history was Rocktober 2007. The scrappy local baseball team refused to lose, winning 21-of-22 games en route to the World Series.

Then, the magic ended with a thud ... and the ugly sound of Boston fans chanting in LoDo, as the Red Sox swept the World Series. An ill-conceived ticket policy gave access to so many loudmouth New Englanders to Coors Field that the Rockies might as well have played Neil Diamond's "Sweet Caroline" during the eighth inning of Game 4.
Well, enough of that sorry noise. The Broncos found an inventive way to shut them up. In the House of Manning, there will be no chowderheads allowed.


The truth is, this guy sounds like an insecure, whiny little bitch.

If this game were being played at Gillette Stadium, I guarantee Mr. Kraft wouldnt limit ticket sales to people of New England.  Why?  Because Massholes would drown out any arrogant Broncos fans in attendance, not that any of those entitled pricks would have the balls to show up in Broncos gear.

The fact that they are excluding people of Massachusetts just means the Broncos organization is scared.  They are scared shitless that Peyton Manning is going to choke again.  They know what's on the line.  They get it.  And they know Massholes, if given the chance, would flood that place and make it Gillette Stadium West.  The people who run that organization are pussies.


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And Another Local Business In Denver Is Taking A Shot At Tom Brady.

via @TerezOwens

Fuck these guys.







VIDEO: The Patriots Are Carl's "Stone Cold Lock Of The Century" Of The Week...And I Cannot Disagree.

In what's being called the "last hurrah for slow, white quarterbacks," Carl is picking the Patriots over the Broncos:









If You Care, Rajon Rondo's First Basket Of The Season Was A Behind The Back Fake.

Rajon Rondo 1st basket on Make A Gif


The Celtics got the best of both worlds last night. Rajon Rondo came back, presumably so he can be showcased for a potential trade a the trade deadline, and they lost. Pissa.







(PHOTO) This Is The Mayor Of Denver Sticking Pretzels In A Tom Brady "Voodoo" Doughnut. I Shit You Not.

via DenverPost.com


Boston Mayor Marty Walsh is facing his first crisis in office. Denver Mayor, Michael Hancock, was at the grand opening of a new doughnut shop in Denver and had the balls to pose for a picture while sticking pretzels in a Tom Brady Voodoo doughnut.

Your move, Mayor Walsh.








FINAL: Bruins 4 Stars 2


But seriously, I miss Tyler Seguin. I really do.  Dont get me wrong, Im happy with what Reilly Smith has done (the dude is leading the team in goals with 15) and Loui Erikkson is a good player.  But Tyler Seguin should still be on this team.  With his two assists last night, he now has 21 goals and 23 assists, for 44 points, on the season.  But I digress.

Anyway, about the game.  Patrice Bergeron, Milan Lucic, David Krejci and Brad Marchand all scored for the Bruins and Chad Johnson had 32 saves in the Bruins 4-2 over the Stars.

Krejci's goal was his tenth of the season.  The Bruins now have seven players with at least ten goals.  This is a friggin deep team.   And it was nice to see Chad Johnson look sharp in his first game in almost a month.  The dude hadn't made a start since December 19th. 

The Bruins are now 30-15-2 and, with the Lightning loss to the Islanders last night, are back in first place in the Atlantic Division.  Pissa.







Your Tweet Of The Day



Okay, Orsillo has officially lost his mind. He is taking selfies with wigs on. Baseball season can't get here fast enough.







It Really Is A Damn Shame That Tom Brady Cant Get A High Five. Here's A Public Service Announcement For All The Massholes.








The Denver Post Is Pretty Ballsy, Huh?

via @RochieWBZ

Thats a rather ballsy headline.  Sure, Ive said worse.  But Im just a petty blogger.  I dont have to adhere to journalistic standards.  This is a major media publication calling the head coach of the Patriots a grump and insinuating that he isnt a good guy.  Nice to see them feeding the hate mongers.  Keep it classy, Denver Post.






Taiwanese Animators Made A Broncos Patriots Preview That Includes An Actual Bronco Smoking Weed And A Brady Manning Pissing Match (Literally)



The people who make these are fucked in the head. Enjoy.









Your Pants Tent Inducing Tweet Of The Day










Some Douchebag Bar Owners In Denver Apparently Enjoy Talking Shit...And Incredibly Cheesy Puns.

These are from a couple of bars in Denver. I give them points for being clever.  But seriously, a middle schooler could have come up with these.


via @ColtMonday



via @Renknowitall



via @ColtMonday