Aaron Hernandez Only Tipped $30 On A $243 Restaurant Tab The Night Odin Lloyd Was Murdered. That’s 12%. What An Asshole.

via @JennyDWilson

This is reportedly a receipt from the restaurant Aaron Hernandez and his friends went to on the night Odin Lloyd was murdered.  The prosecution presented it today at his trial in an attempt to recount the timeline of events that night.

And I did the math.  That is a 12% tip.  I'm not one to judge how much someone tips, but the dude was making over $5,000,000 a year and signed a $12,500,000 signing bonus.  Seems kinda douchey considering.



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VIDEO: David Ortiz Just Heard About The New Rule About Keeping One Foot In Batters Box And Called It "Bullshit." Um...Okay.

Watch as David Ortiz literally just learns about the new rule about keeping one foot in the batters box and responds by calling it "bullshit."

He also said he will run out of money of they fine him every time he does it.  I think it's safe to say MLB is not going to enforce these new rules to speed up the game. 






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Rajon Rondo Ignored His Head Coach, Got Into An Argument With Him Then Got Benched. I Always Knew He Was A Dick.

Watch Rick Carlisle scream at Rajon Rondo to call a timeout. And watch Rondo blatanly ignore him:




And here's Rick Carlisle telling Rondo to sit his ass down. For the record, Rondo got benched for the rest of the game.




I can't believe people around here stuck up for him as long as they did.  The guy isn't talented enough to be a pain in the ass.  I'm just glad the Celtics don't have to worry about this kind of bullshit melodrama.


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Holy Shit, Big Papi Arrived At Spring Training Today....Skinny.

This is David Ortiz arriving at Spring Training today and no, it is not photoshopped.

via @MattPep15

What cracks me up is that if had Papi arrived with a little bit of chub like Pablo Sandoval, the media would be going apeshit right now.  But he shows up slim and in shape and we hear crickets. The Boston mainstream media really does suck.



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Indy Star Columnist Wants Super Bowl XLIX To Be "Vacated" If Wells Report Proves Patriots Deflated Balls. You Can't Make This Shit Up.



From IndyStar.com:
The Patriots have a track record under Belichick of pushing the ethical boundaries (their substitution patterns that forced the NFL to make an adjustment for the Super Bowl) and outright cheating (Spygate). You get what you earn. The Patriots have earned our distrust.

And maybe the Patriots did rig the AFC title game, not that they needed to. If the Wells Report makes that conclusion, well, the Patriots are the biggest losers. I'd love to see Super Bowl XLIX vacated. I'd love to see Belichick suspended the entire 2015 season. That assumes the Wells Report proves he cheated.

I guess this, Gregg Doyel, guy doesn't believe in science.  Or have the internet.  Seriously, when this asshole writes, all I see is "bla bla bla."



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One Of The First Things Dustin Pedroia Did When He Arrived At Spring Training Yesterday Was Threaten Dan Shaughnessy. I Friggin Love This Guy.



Dustin Pedroia's first day of Spring Training was yesterday and Dan Shaughnessy tweeted this gem:


@DanShaughnessy

I'm sure he was joking.  Well, he was probably half joking.  Actually, he probably meant it and awkwardly laughed after so that mega douchebag Shaughnessy wouldn't call security and make a thing out of it.

Seriously, is there a more arrogant, pompous dickhead in the Boston media than Dan Shaughnessy?  The guy used to be a good sports writer then something changed.  I'm not sure when, but the dude turned into a crusty old troll who gets some sort of sick thrill out of pissing people off.

Remember, in one of his columns he accused David Ortiz of being on steroids because he was old and Dominican...and somehow he didn't lose his job at the Boston Globe.

And in July of 2014 he had the balls to write, "the Sox have a chance to finish in last place for the second time in three years, win a playoff game in only one of six seasons, and still be perceived by their fans as 'perennial contenders.'"

Note that he conveniently ignored the fact that the Red Sox actually won 11 playoffs games and the friggin World Series in 2013.  That is a master troll at work right there.  Seriously, that is probably the douchiest sentence in the history of Boston sports journalism.

I could go on and on with examples of Shaughnessy's douchebaggery but I don't want to get carpal tunnel syndrome writing a 150,000 word article.

Anyway, I'm glad Pedroia gave Shaughnessy that verbal bitch slap.  And if I had a press pass, the first thing I'd ask Pedroia is how exactly he planned on doing it--peruvian necktie, DDT?  And my followup question would be, "is it ok if I help you with that?"


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FINAL: Blues 5 Bruins 1



Malcolm Subban gave up three goals on the first six shots he saw and all three were to his glove side. So yea, the Bruins only trading chip is now worth shit.

I still have no friggin idea why Claude Julien would start Subban against the #2 seed St Louis Blues and against the last place Oilers the other night.  I swear, Julien and Chiarelli are daring Cam Neely to fire them.

And on top of the debacle that was Subban, David Krejci left the game with a "lower body injury."  It doesn't even matter though.  The season is in the shitter now.

The Florida Panthers are most likely going to make the playoffs this season and the Bruins won't. I don't know how the hell Neely doesn't clean house the day after this miserable season ends.

Peter Chiarelli hasn't done shit for this team this year.  Sitting there with your thumb up your ass while your team slowly floats up shits creek is a fireable offense as far as Im concerned.  And trading Johnny Boychuk, Tyler Seguin and not signing Shawn Thornton doesn't help his cause either.



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And This Is Tuukka Rask Getting A Little Pissy And Throwing A Chair When He Found Out He Was Coming In For Malcolm Subban.



I don't blame the dude.  He thought he was getting he night off.  Hell, I'd get a little pissy too if I got called into work on my off night.  Anyway, he's now played in 25 of the Bruins last 26 games.



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Mike Milbury Says He Would “Strongly Consider” Coaching The Bruins When Claude Julien Gets Fired. And So It Begins.


From CSNNE:
With the Boston Bruins struggling right now Claude Julien's job may be on the line.  If their coach gets fired, could a familiar face take over the helm of the Black and Gold?

Before making a commitment to Julien eight years ago, NBC Sports' Mike Milbury was a candidate for the job. Would he be interested if the job opened up in the near future?
I'm not chomping at the bit [to coach]. But when somebody dangles that carrot in front of you and gives you an opportunity like that, there's so few chances like that. I'd have to say I'd strongly consider it if that came around."

I am so sick and tired of hearing Claude Julien come out after a loss and say, "oh well.  We didn't play well and we need to play better."  This team needs a coach with balls and at least a little bit of passion.

The players have obviously stopped playing for Julien.  I mean, they have the pieces to compete for the Stanley Cup.  Tuukka Rask won the Vezina last year for Christ's sake.  He isn't the problem.  There are 29 other teams in the league that would kill to have Zdeno Chara anchoring their blue line.  He isn't the problem.

The problem is Peter Chiarelli didn't have the balls to trade for a first line right winger this offseason and that Claude Julien has lost that locker room.

If Cam Neely had any balls, he would fire Julien right now and replace him with Mike Milbury.  At least they would have the chance to save the season then.

But what most likely will happen is the Bruins won't make the playoffs this season and the players will get their wish.  Claude Julien and Peter Chiarelli will be fired.

And I hope to Christ that Cam Neely hires Mike Milbury.  Sure, he sucked as head coach of the Islanders but that was a long time ago.  This particular team, right now, needs someone with brass balls and with Bruins old time DNA.


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I Think This Just About Sums Up DeflateGate










FINAL: Oilers 4 Bruins 3




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This Is The Game Winning Shootout Goal From Last Night. Talk About A Sucky Way To Lose A Game.

The dude never even took a shot.




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VIDEO: Adam Shefter Says NFL Official Got Fired For Stealing And Selling Balls From DeflateGate Game. You Can't Make This Shit Up.

Listen as Adam Shefter explains how a league official whose job it was to handle footballs during the AFC Championship game got fired for selling footballs from that game.

DeflateGate is a shitshow right now. A complete and utter shit show.  Roger Goodell better be writing his apology to Robert Kraft like now or he's going to be unemployed real soon.






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REPORT: Patriots Locker Room Attendant Gave Unapproved Footballs To Official In AFC Championship Game. But It’s ESPN Reporting…So There’s That.



From ESPN:
A locker room attendant for the New England Patriots tried to introduce an unapproved special teams football into last month's AFC Championship Game.

In the first half of the AFC Championship Game, the sources said, McNally tried to give the unapproved football to an alternate official.

Walt Anderson, the referee for the AFC title game, had personally inspected and marked each of the footballs that were approved for use in that game. The alternate official, Greg Yette, became suspicious when he noticed that the football McNally handed him did not have the proper markings on it, three sources said.

So now DeflateGate isn’t about intentionally deflating footballs. Now it’s about a locker room attendant giving the wrong footballs to the wrong official. Wow, talk about making shit up.

This sounds like nothing more than an idiot locker room attendant making a simple mistake. But I guess ESPN needs to boost their ratings and web stats.

Once again, they are catering to the Patriots haters, but this time with a half assed report that led to them finding out the Patriots ball boy is incompetent. Good job, ESPN. Good effort.

Yet they refuse to investigate Jerry Rice's use of stickum and his bogus career. Ugh.


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A-Rod Wrote A Handwritten Letter Apologizing To Fans For Being A Douchebag. This Guy Is A Friggin Weirdo And A Bit Of A Sociopath.



First of all, who the hell hand writes letters anymore?  I can only assume he hand wrote this because he wants this to be framed in the Steroid Hall Of Fame someday or something.  Or maybe the douche wants to auction the letter off.  I don't know.

Secondly, nobody gives a shit.  A-Rod is and will always be the biggest mancunt ever to play baseball.  Period.  And this just makes him look like an egomaniacal sociopath  trying to win back fans so he won't get booed to high hell come opening day.  Yea, good luck with that, A-Fraud.


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VIDEO: Old School Masshole Explains What Happens When You Take Someones Shoveled Spot In Southie Including "Putting A Ping Pong Ball In Their Gas Tank" And Watching Them "Get All Pissy."

Listen at the 1:36 mark when this old school masshole explains how to take care of someone who moves a space saver and steals a shoveled spot in Southie.

He also explains how the newcomers to Southie tend to steal spots and are “all about I” and “get all pissy” when something happens to their vehicle.  This guy is the balls.


http://bcove.me/50umyrzz

(Boston.com is kinda douchey with their videos and wont let me post it here, so click here to watch the video on Boston.com)



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FINAL: Flames 4 Bruins 3 (OT)



It's official.  This team just doesn't give a shit anymore.  Peter Chiarelli needs to do something big at the trade deadline.  Im not saying he should go nuclear, but he has to do something to light a fire under their collective asses.  This is a friggin joke.



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Peyton Manning Screwed Up His One Line On The SNL 40 Special..Proving Again He Just Isn't Good Under Pressure.

Watch as Peyton Manning walks on stage, mumbles then says his line twice. Yea, I'm pretty sure it wasn't supposed to go like that.  But hey, since when is he good in big moments.

(he comes on right after Chris Rock)



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The Red Sox Equipment Truck Arrived In Fort Myers This Morning...



I'm so ready to just say fuck it and drive to Florida too.


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Here's Something To Get Your Mind Of This Cold Assed Winter: Video Of Mike Napoli Taking Batting Practice In Fort Myers.

All you see is blue skies and all you can hear is the crack of the bat.  Damn, spring can't get here fast enough.

















This Is Video Of A Masshole Snowboarding At Fenway Today. This Guy Is Friggin Nuts.




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Yup.



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VIDEO: Jim Cantore Was In Plymouth This Morning And Saw Thundersnow…And Absolutely Lost His Shit.

This guy is pissa.

By the way, this is almost exactly how I reacted when the Patriots won the Super Bowl except I screamed, "number four, number four!"





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Well, Its Official. This Has Been The Snowiest February Ever.



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This Is Video Of Some Masshole Snowboarding On Comm Ave. Seriously.




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This Sounds About Right...



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FINAL: Canucks 5 Bruins 2



The Panthers lost last night, so the Bruins still have a four point lead for the final playoff spot in the Eastern Conference. So there's that.

Don't get me wrong.  I can see the Bruins sneaking into the playoffs as the #8 seed and upsetting say, the Islanders in the first round.  That being said, barring a major trade (which we all know Chiarelli doesn't have the balls to pull off) the next month and a half are going to be a lot of the same bullshit.  And it's going going to be friggin painful to watch.

It's frustrating as all hell knowing the front office is fine treading water and basically letting this team be the Florida Panthers.  Like I said, pitchers and catchers report in six days.



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VIDEO: A News Reporter Awkwardly Asked Gronk Out For Valentine's Day While Doing A Report On Him.

Wow, she's so smooth.




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So, I Guess There's Another Blizzard Coming This Weekend. That Sucks.



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Because I Haven't Shat On Richard Sherman In A While...




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Today Is Red Sox "Truck Day." Here's A Picture Of The First Equipment Truck Getting Ready To Leave For Fort Myers.



Well, that's rather massholey of them.


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People Actually Sang Sweet Caroline At Fenway Park Today For Truck Day. I'm Sorry But That's So Friggin Tacky.

Maybe I'm a little pissy because of all the snow, but come on.  I mean, it's a bunch of stupid trucks filled with equipment.  Am I missing something?




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David Letterman Had The Balls To Ask Belichick If There Was Any "Horseplay" When It Came To DeflateGate. Come On Dave, Get A Friggin Clue.

David Letterman actually asked Bill Belichick, "was there any horseplay" when it came to deflating footballs.  If Dave knew what the internet was he would know that DeflateGate was actually a witch hunt started by the butthurt GM of the Colts and perpetuated by some douchey sports writer in Indiana.  But I digress.









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And Here Is Hitler Reacting To The Patriots Winning The Super Bowl.

Well, you knew this was coming.




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Here's Another Tom Brady Tribute Video...Because These Things Never Get Friggin Old.

From the Drew Bledsoe injury to John Madden questioning Bill Belichick's balls in Super Bowl XXXVI to Tom Brady becoming the greatest quarterback in the history of the NFL.  Enjoy, folks:





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The Patriots Super Bowl XLIX DVD Trailer Is Out. And I Think I Just Got A Mini Sportsgasm.

Here's the cover:



It will officially be for sale on March 3rd.  The trailer is out but the NFL is wicked douchey with their videos, so I can't post it here.  CLICK HERE TO VIEW IT ON NFL.COM


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Bob Kravitz, The Columnist Who Broke The Bogus DeflateGate Story, Issued A Half Assed Apology.


 From WTHR.com:
Before my mea culpa, let me get this out of the way right now:

I am not in the least bit sorry about breaking DeflateGate, even if it's cluttered my Twitter timeline and included vicious shots at me and my family. I got it from a great source. I knew with 100 percent certainty that it was right, that there was an investigation into the possibility the Patriots had deflated their footballs.  There WAS, and IS, an investigation. It's my job to get it right, and I got it right.

I wrote that if owner Robert Kraft had an ounce of integrity, Belichick would be bounced immediately, draft picks should be forfeited and the Pats should be fined. What I failed to do was make it abundantly clear, “IF the Patriots are found guilty of having tampered with the footballs…''

I am a professional communicator, and as a professional communicator, I failed miserably there. I have to wear that one. I own that one.  So there you go.

I’m not buying one word of this bullshit, half assed apology.

First of all, it isn't even an apology.  Secondly, this is the same guy who wrote an article before the AFC Championship game and said, “The Patriots are the Evil Empire, the football version of the Yankees or Kentucky basketball. They've been so good for so long, I'm just sick and tired of them. Do we really want to spend another Super Bowl week listening to Bill Belichick mumble non-answers? No, we do not.”

So, to say that he simply failed as a communicator when he questioned Robert Kraft's integrity and called for the NFL to go nuclear on the Patriots is pure bullshit.

The reality is, when this asshole heard that those footballs were being inspected, he found an opportunity to pounce. This prick finally had a chance to smear the Patriots, kick Bill Belichick in the balls and tarnish the Patriots reputation. And he did all of the above.

Which is why this apology is nothing more than 4,000 or pure grade bullshit. Let’s be serious, this apology is just a pathetic attempt to get people to stop harassing him on Twitter and in the comment section of his articles.

Tough shit, asshole. When you start a witch hunt and fail, you’re the one who gets burned at the stake. This douche now has to live with the sins of his past and will feel the wrath of massholes for the rest of his pathetic writing career.

The bottom line is, this guy fucked with the wrong people.  Sorry Bob Kravitz.  You made your bed now you have to lie in it, bitch.



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FINAL: Stars 5 Bruins 3



Hey, at least they didn't get burned by Tyler Seguin.  Thankfully, he was battling a hangover...I mean the flu.  So, there's that.






VIDEO: I’m Pretty Sure This News Anchor Said We’re Getting More Snow “Just In Fucking Time” For Tomorrow Morning’s Commute.

Well, that was very massholey of her.




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Okay, Mother Nature Can Cut The Shit Now.



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Here's The OYO Re-creation Of The Super Bowl We've All Been Waiting For.

They even included Brady's sideline freakout at the end of the game and Gronk going nuts at the parade. Pissa.








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"A Gronking to Remember 2: Chad Goes Deep In The Neutral Zone" Is Now Out...If You Give A Shit.



Here's an excerpt from Amazon:
Leigh has a serious problem. And it’s the sick, twisted pervert who’s kidnapped her for his own pleasure! Chad! 

When Leigh spurns his advances at a party he throws in her honor, Chad goes haywire and kidnaps her, stealing her away to his personal New England Patriots Shangri-La, a secret Man Cave hundreds of feet below sea level he affectionately calls his “Chadmiral’s Quarters.”

Seriously. who the hell reads this crap?


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Vince Wilfork Saw A Dude Wearing His Jersey In The Bahamas And Shook His Hand. Vince Is The Friggin Man.

A video posted by Bianca Wilfork (@mrs75) on


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NEWSFLASH: It's Going To Snow. A Lot.



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Robert Kraft Was Hanging Out With A Pissed Off Jay-Z, Kayne West, Nas And Big Sean Yesterday....If You Give A Shit.

This is Robert Kraft at a Roc Nation hosted brunch yesterday with Jay-Z, Kayne West, Nas, Steve Stoute and Big Sean.



I don't know why they all look pissed off.  Each of them has more money than I will ever see.



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Torey Krug Kicked Ryan Strome's Ass Just 1:53 Into The Game. Yea, I Think The Patriots Fired Them Up Just A Little Bit.




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So, Jerry Rice Admits To Illegally Using Stickum After Saying The Patriots Super Bowl Win Deserves An Asterisk Because Of DeflateGate.



If you live under a rock and haven't heard, Jerry Rice admitted to using the banned substance, stickum, during his career.

He also said the Patriots Super Bowl win should have an asterisk next to it because of the false accusations of using deflated balls.  This guy is a fucking hypocrite of the highest order.

I cannot wait to see how Roger Goodell handles this.  I mean, the guy admitted to cheating.  Period.  The NFL can't just sit there with their thumbs up there ass.  Actually, knowing how Roger Goodell handles investigations, I guess they can.


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Jerry Rice's Wikipedia Page Has Been Appropriately Updated. Cheating Bastid.

This is from Jerry Rice's Wikipedia page:




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Jerry Rice Is Using The "Everyone Was Doing It" Excuse. What A Douchebag.

@JerryRice

Oh my God, how fucking arrogant is this guy?  Everyone else was filming opposing players' signs on the sidelines too. Yet the Bill Belichick got fined $500,000, the Patriots got fined $250,000 and they lost a draft pick.

Jerry Rice may have just outed himself as the biggest fraud in the history of the NFL and honestly thinks it's no big deal.  What a mega douchebag.


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VIDEO: Aaron Hernandez's Lawyer Made A DeflateGate Joke At His Trial. What A Wise Ass.

This is one of Aaron Hernandez's lawyer making a DeflateGate with a Massachusetts State Trooper on the stand.  Wow, what a wise ass.  I can't even imagine what jokes he has up his sleeve for Bill Belichick and Robert Kraft if they are called in to testify.





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I Think Hating Tom Brady Has Officially Become A National Pastime.



From TalkOfFameNetwork.com:
Charles Haley owns an NFL-record five Super Bowl rings. Quarterbacks Joe Montana and Tom Brady have four apiece. When asked during an interview with the Talk of Fame Network to choose between the two quarterbacks, Haley didn’t hesitate — Montana.

“Joe didn’t have to cheat,” Haley said. “I’ve lost all respect (for Brady). When your integrity is challenged in the game of football, to me, all his Super Bowls are tainted. I could be wrong. But I realize there were 12 balls deflated and 12 ain’t. Then you’ve got (Patriots coach Bill) Belichick coming on three different times trying to explain it… You know something is wrong.”

“This is what Charles Haley believes — it’s going to come back to haunt him one day,” Haley said.

First of all, anyone who refers to themselves in the third person is an asshole.

Now that I got that out of the way, it's worth mentioning that this guy was teammates with Joe Montana, so his opinion is just a little tainted.  Actually, it's very tainted.  Actually, no one gives a shit about his opinion....he played with Joe Montana.

Another reason he's probably a little pissy because he has five Super Bowl rings and his twitter account isn't even verified (seriously, @CharlesHaley94 has been on twitter since 2011 and isn't verified).

Anyway, I seriously may have to start a daily segment called "Tom Brady Hating Asshole Of The Day."  This is getting ridiculous.


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A Seahawks Fan Wrote A 3,000 Word "Open Letter" To The Patriots Bitching And Moaning About How They Acted Unprofessionally During The Super Bowl Parade. I Shit You Not.


From Q13 Fox in Seattle:
A woman sent this letter to Q13 FOX following news that some of the New England Patriots players appeared to take shots at the Seahawks during the Super Bowl Victory Parade on Wednesday.
(the actual letter is 3,000 words. This is a summary of the bitching and moaning):. 
Flying off at the mouth during the intensity and high stress moments of a football game is one thing, but going out of your way to parade around in front of your fans holding disrespectful signs and t-shirts directed towards the opposing team is simply bad form.

I would think you would want to be spending your celebratory parade actually celebrating your Superbowl championship win instead of dwelling on the other team. Any respect I had for your team before this incident was quickly lost when I saw your arrogant and unprofessional behavior.

The NFL is a great organization to be a part of and I hope that you will do it justice by acting like a team that deserves to win by not only your physical attributes and skill sets but by the quality of your character.
Sincerely,

Amanda from Tacoma, Washington

Is this shit-for-brains Seahawks fan really that clueless? She realizes that Richard Sherman and Marshawn Lynch play for the Seahawks right?

Sherman is the epitome of douchebaggery. He talks more shit than a plumber and he's the guy who infamously tweeted that picture of himself running his mouth at the greatest quarterback to ever play in the NFL with the caption "u mad bro?"

And Marshawn Lynch’s douchgabbery is right on par with Sherman. He has made a mockery of this league with his stupid press conferences and literally acts like a 5 year old who is pissed at their parents.

Oh yea, and one of her players pretended to take a shit after a touchdown IN THE SUPER BOWL.  This actually happened:



Remember, the Patriots didn't hold up signs or t-shirts rubbing it the Rams, Panthers or Eagles faces after they beat them.  This is a Seahawks thing and it's is a direct response to the way that team handled themselves.  When you talk shit, you're going to eventually eat shit.  It's called karma.  The 12th man can bitch and moan all they want.  They had this coming.

And Q13 Fox in Seattle ought to be ashamed of themselves for posting such anti-Patriots propaganda.  But like I said before, the Patriots haters are not going away.  These assholes are always going to be here and this is the kind of bullshit we're going to have to deal with.  Forever.


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This Sounds About Right



The media shat on the Patriots all season.  And all season, they just sat there and took it.  They could have mouthed off like Richard Sherman and the like, but they didn't.  They kept it pent up inside.

Which is why I have absolutely no problem with them shoving it straight up the media's ass on the day of their Super Bowl Championship parade.


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This Little Masshole Is So Spoiled.




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I'm Pretty Sure This Is Gronk Chugging A Busch Light. Dude's Pissa.



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VIDEO: Julian Edelman Literally Punched A Richard Sherman Sign Today. He Friggin Owned This Parade.





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These Were Easily The Massholiest Shirts Of The Day



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